Scary Looking Comic Strips - Page 13
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Dilbert has been struck by the Curse of Dogbert. He has Dogbert's ears and nose. Dilbert says to the garbage man, "...And the Dogbert Curse strikes anyone who sends a chain letter. But the letter said I'd die if I didn't." Dilbert continues, "You're the world's smartest garbage man. How would you handle this?" The garbage man shoves a bag of trash into the garbage truck. Dilbert walks up to Dogbert dressed as a garbage man, but still looking like Dogbert. He says, "Did you know there's also a Garbage Man's Curse for people who send chain letters?" Swami Dogbert wears his turban and wags his tail.
Dilbert stands in front of a line graph titled, "$". Dilbert says, "I had to make some optimistic assumptions to meet the revenue target." The Boss is sitting behind Dilbert, looking at the graph. Dilbert continues, "In week three, we're visited by an alien named D'utox Inag who offers to share his advanced technology." The Boss asks, "Then do we use his technology to design our new product?" Dilbert replies, "No, we kill him and sell the autopsy video."
Dilbert looking at Dogbert's cartoon. Dogbert sitting next to him. Dilbert says, "Your comic strip seems to be nothing but a clown with a small head who says random things." Dogbert responds, "That's Pippy." Dogbert explains, "I'm maintaining my artistic integrity by creating a comic that no one will enjoy." Dilbert says, "The important thing is that YOU enjoy it." Dogbert replies, "The first two were okay, but now I'm just bitter."
Wally, The Boss, and Allen the Sycophant sitting at table. The Boss says, "That's my plan. What does everyone think?" Allen exclaims, "Brilliant!" The Boss and Dilbert looking at Allen as he raves, "THAT IS THE BEST PLAN EVER MADE!! WOW! OOH-WAH! YOU DA MAN!!" The Boss says, "That's the type of honest feedback we need." Allen says, "I love it when you exhale in my direction."
Bob the Dinosaur looking at Dogbert, who is wearing a crown and staring at himself in a mirror. Bob inquires, "What's the crown for?" Dogbert turns around and answers, "There aren't any charismatic leaders in the world lately. I'm going to fill the void." Bob asks, "Don't charismatic leaders usually turn out to be egomaniacal, philandering sociopaths?" Dogbert looks into the mirror and replies, "And they look good in hats!"
Wally looking at a bloated Dilbert. Dilbert says, "My dog put fertility drugs in my coffee." Dilbert continues, "At first I was mad. Then the tabloids offered me a million dollars for my story." Wally inquires, "Have you seen a doctor?" Dilbert replies, "My agent advises against that."
Dilbert and Dogbert sitting in front of computer. Dogbert, while typing, says, "I'll cure your shyness by putting nude photos of you on the Internet." Dilbert and Dogbert looking at computer screen. Computer makes "AAEEII!!," "COUGH COUGH," "UNH" sounds. Dilbert and Dogbert sitting at table eating cereal and hot drink. Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I didn't know the Internet could reject a body." Dogbert replies, "I didn't know it could scream."
Dilbert looking over into Wally's adjacent cubicle. Wally is sitting in his cubicle. Dilbert says, "Our pointy-haired boss won't tell me our company's strategy." Dilbert says, "So I spend my days wandering from cubicle to cubicle, trying to deduce the strategy." Dilbert looking over into Wally's adjacent cubicle. Wally is sitting in his cubicle. Dilbert says, "So far I've ruled out 'First to market.'" Wally responds, "And premiere anything."
Dilbert speaking with Wally while construction worker hammers away at roof for Wally's cubicle. Dilbert says to Wally, "Your cubicle roof is looking good." Wally responds, "Yep." Wally says to Dilbert, "I love being a skilled worker in a period of low unemployment. I can get anything I demand." Construction worker throws a something at while thay hits him in the head and then says, "Hey, Poindexter, fetch me a lemonade." Dilbert exclaims, "Ouch."
Wally, Carol, and Ted sitting at a table. Wally says, "Unlike you people in Marketing, I have highly sought technical skills." Carol looking at Wally while he says, "I'm too valuable to fire. So from now on, I'll deliver my project status on a balled-up piece of paper." Carol growls with her arms folded, "Grrr." Wally asks, "Is the cheerleader squad ready?" as he is about to flick a crumbled piece of paper into Ted's open arms (table hockey).