Talk Comic Strips - Page 13

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

368 Results for Talk

View 121 - 130 results for talk comic strips. Discover the best "Talk" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dogbert, eat for a day, fish, ugly hat, you're consultant, animals

View Transcript

Transcript

Headline: Dogbert Consults. Dogbert says to The Boss, "If you give a man a fish, he will eat for a day." Dogbert continues, "But if you teach a man to fish, he will buy an ugly hat." Dogbert continues, "And if you talk about fish to a starving man then you're a consultant."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags email, fax, letter, copy of message, voice mail

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Alice, "Alice, I just sent you an email." The Boss continues, "Here's a copy of my message but I'll just tell you what it says." The Boss concludes, "It says I sent you a voice mail telling you to look for a fax that says I want to talk to you." Alice clenches her teeth.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags unemployed, drive electric car, abs, not romantic, turn on, socialize, mingle, party, drinks

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert approaches a woman at a party and says, "I'm unemployed and I drive an electric car." Dilbert continues, "These are my abs. I talk too much about myself and I'm not romantic." Dilbert continues, "I realize it's a long shot but does any of that turn you on?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags change your mind, sales + talk= stalk, sales guy, new position, not good, Dilbert

View Transcript

Transcript

Headline: Dilbert the Sales Guy. Dilbert is meeting with a customer. He says, "I'll talk to you every day to see if you change your mind." The customer replies, "Don't talk to me every day." Dilbert says, "You might change your mind." Dilbert comes home and says to Dogbert, "Did you know that if you cross 'sales' with 'talk' you get 'stalk?'"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags non monetary rewards, program, self mentoring, talk to yourself

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss approaches Asok and says, "Asok, I'm putting you on our special self- monitoring program." The Boss continues, "If you have any questions whatsoever, feel free to talk to yourself." As he walks away, The Boss thinks, "I'm the master of non-monetary rewards."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags criticize employees, recreational criticising, read email, alice needs to talk

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss thinks, "I'm in a bad mood. Maybe I'll feel better if I criticize some employees." The Boss approaches Dilbert and says, "I'm doing some recreational criticizing. What do you have for me?" Dilbert responds, "E-mail." The Boss yells, "You read e-mail like a chimp!" Dilbert replies, "Alice said she needs to talk to you."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags hands free phone, insulting comments, boss directed, pointy haired, face transplant, baboon, personal calls, company time

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss is walking past Wally. Wally says, "You're an ignorant maggot. You disgust me." Wally continues, "You should get a face transplant from a baboon." The Boss exclaims, "What?!" Wally points to his headset and explains, "I'm not talking to you. I'm using my hands-free phone." The Boss replies, "Oh.. for a minute I thought... well, nevermind." Wally says, "Ha ha! You might be the most gullible moron in the galaxy!" Wally yells, "You pointy-haired, gray-suited pile of crud!!!" The Boss faces Wally, fuming with anger. Wally says into his headset, "Mom, can you hold? My excellent boss wants to talk to me." Wally asks sheepishly, "What?" The Boss exclaims, "No personal calls on company time!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags 3 year anniversary, first meeting, project requirements, probelm

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert addresses a meeting, "Today is the three-year anniversary of our first meeting to discuss project requirements." Dilbert continues, "And we're still discussing requirements. Does anyone else see a problem here?" A coworker turns to Dilbert and says, "When you're done, can we talk about requirements?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dogbert tech support., personal computer, defective, attractive package

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert Tech Support. Dogbert says into his telephone headset, "It works fine on my machine." On the other end of the line, the customer says, "Yes, but this call is about MY PC. May we talk about MY problem now?" Dogbert replies, "Okay, your PC is defective and you're selfish. That's an attractive package you've got going there."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags walk and talk, not their names, boss waves, distarcted

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert approaches The Boss and asks, "Do you have a second?" The Boss replies, "Walk and talk." Dilbert begins, "So, the supplier won't.." The Boss interrupts him with, "Hi, Pete. Hey, Tim. Hi, Barb. How are you? Not bad. Hi." Dilbert says, "Um.. Those aren't their names." The Boss replies, "My way is easier... Hi, Ted."