Wrong Comic Strips - Page 13
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347 Results for Wrong
View 121 - 130 results for wrong comic strips. Discover the best "Wrong" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday December 20,
2004
Tags online ereume, older chubby men, key words, married men, job offers, cousin, Advice, one line job hunting
Transcript
"I wasn't getting any responses to my online resume until I inserted some key words." "I said I'm strangely attracted to older, chubby, married men with coffee-stained teeth." "That is wrong on so many levels." "Explain that to my six thousand job offers."
Top Dilbert Searches
marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Friday January 28,
2005
Tags response to letter, apologize, admits error, starting war, mean spirit, hating minorities
Transcript
Carol: "Hey, I got a response from the newspaper columnist I reamed for misusing the word "dongle."" ""Dear Nutbag... Link to a dictionary..." Um... Oops... It appears that I was wrong." "Now do you apologize?" "Plan B: I accuse him of hating minorities."
Friday February 25,
2005
Tags die die, evil eye, respect, sat down wrong, wedgie
Transcript
Tina: He doesn't respect my work. I can tell by the way he's sitting. "Two can play this game. I will hate you with the fury of a thousand suns!" "Die! Die! Die~" Dilbert: "Rats. I sat down wrong and gave myself a wedgie."
Monday March 28,
2005
Tags emotionally unstable coworkers, prescribe meds, wrong choice, defects
Transcript
Dogbert: All of your problems are caused by emotionally unstable coworkers. "Try prescribing meds from the internet to fix their defects." Dilbert: Okay. That one was the wrong choice. Let's try something else." The Boss: "GRRRR!"
Monday June 27,
2005
Tags ceo, limo, miss pennington, harold, rat bert, surgery, medical
Transcript
Ratbert the CEO "Miss Pennington, have my driver fetch the limo." "My name isn't Miss Pennington. It's Harold." "And?" "Um...and...I'll have it legally changed to Miss Pennington so you won't be wrong." "Plus the surgery."
Thursday July 07,
2005
Tags do something, let you know, spitting on forehead, whats worng
Transcript
"When you do something that I don't like, I'll let you know by cursing and then spitting on your forehead." "Maybe you could just tell me what I did wrong." "#*$@!"
Sunday July 17,
2005
Tags wrong budget, no probelms, unrealitic, failure, deceptive forecstas, believe the lie, deception, optimism, few hours, perfect budget
Transcript
"This budget would only work if the project encountered no problems whatsoever." "So?" "All projects have unexpected problems. Therefore, this budget is almost certainly wrong." "Leaders do not plan for failure." "Do leaders make deceptive forecasts and later act shocked when things don't work out?" "No." "A leader first makes himself believe the lie, thus turning deception into an inspiring form of optimism. Observe." "GAAA!!! BELIEVE! BELIEVE!" "The swelling will go down in a few hours. Then we'll have a perfect budget." "What?"
Thursday August 11,
2005
Tags project post mortem, colossal ineptitude, natural talents, unfocused honest
Transcript
The boss: "The project post-mortem will only be helpful if each of you is honest about what went wrong." "Your colossal ineptitude as a leader suppressed our natural talents, leaving us listless and unfocused." "And by 'honest', I mean blaming people who aren't here." "Look! You're doing it again!"
Thursday September 08,
2005
Sunday September 18,
2005
Transcript
I want to get a good base tan before I take my vacation. "That'll prevent me from getting a sunburn when I go to the beach." "I think it's a myth that a base tan can protect you from sunburns." "You are so wrong! Let's make a bet. The loser has to jump into that freezing pond." "Fine. I'll do a search on my wireless computer. Here you go: A base tan provides only a negligible SPF 4 protection." "I'm not jumping into that freezing pond." PUSH "You were already ignorant and contentious. I didn't want you to be a welcher too."


