300% More Criticism Comic Strips - Page 13

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View 121 - 130 results for 300% more criticism comic strips. Discover the best "300% More Criticism" comics from Dilbert.com.

Good Day At Work

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Good Day At Work - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags work, morale, engagment, boredom, anger, frustration

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Dogbert: How's work? Dilbert: On a good day, the frustration and anger solve for the boredom. Dogbert: What's a bad day like? Dilbert: Same as a good day but with more questions.

Signal To Noise Ratio

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Signal To Noise Ratio  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags compliments, backhanded compliment, criticism, engineers

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Boss: What did you think of my presentation? Dilbert: The signal-to-noise ratio was impressively low. Boss: Engineers give weird compliments.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags work ethic, productivity, progress, project, deception

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Asok: I finished my project! Dilbert: Shhhh! Don't let anyone hear you say that. Only one of two things can come of it. Either you'll get more work or you'll get fired for not having enough work. Asok: Then how does anyone ever finish a project around here? Wally: We don't. We manipulate our boss into adding features so our projects are never complete. Asok: Is that hard to do? Dilbert: Not as hard as you might hope. Asok: How do you like the prototype so far? Boss: It needs a red button and some cooling fins.

Spittle

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Spittle - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags exercise, fitness, fad, bossercise, yelling, criticism, managers, health

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Boss: If you need me, I'll be Bossercizing. Carol: What? Boss: It's a combination of walking around and spittle-yelling at underperformers. Carol: Is the spittle part necessary? Boss: Thhtop queth-tioning me!!!

Bossercize

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Bossercize - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags exercise, personal trainer, fitness, bossercise, criticism, managers, health

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Narrator: Dogbert The Personal Trainer. Dogbert: I invented a fitness routine I call Bossercise. It mostly involves strutting around the office and criticizing people. Boss: You incompetent fool! Dogbert: Give me twenty more reps.

Show More Initiative

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Show More Initiative - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers, boss, criticism, encouragement, initiative, engagement

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Boss: You fool! That web page is not designed the way I would have done it! And I never would have explained it this way! Lastly, I want you to show more initiative. Dilbert: Are you still here?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags suggestion, invention, budget, money

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Dilbert: The electronic suggestion box project is halfway done. The original design called for a bos that scans and digitizes suggestions written on paper and emails them to the appropriate manager. Then the device shreds the original paper suggestion to make room for more. I already built the box and the shredder. I'll need additional funding to finish the scanning part. Boss: We don't have any flexibility in our budget. Let's just deploy what you have. Dilbert: All I have is a box that shreds suggestions before anyone reads them. Boss: Don't let perfect be the enemy of good.

Boss Loves Criticism

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Boss Loves Criticism - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags mentor, mentee, protege, Advice, competition, deception

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Alice The Mentor. Alice: One thing I can tell you about our boss is that he loves constructive criticism. Man: I feel as if your advice is intended to make me fail because you see me as a threat to take your job. Alice: And he loves it when you grab him by the hair and yell, "handles!"

Bad Analogies

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Bad Analogies - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags ideas, criticism, critique, simile, language

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Man: Your idea is awful. Dilbert: Can you explain your reasons without using an absurd analogy? Man: It's like a pregnant squirrel eating a sandwich. Dilbert: I'll take that as a no.

Need To Be More Creative

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Need To Be More Creative - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags manager, managing, creativity, company culture, control, leadership

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Boss: We need to be more creative. Also, don't do anything except what I tell you to do or else I'll fire you. Dilbert: Thank you for your leadership. Boss: We also need to communicate less.