Wally Comic Strips - Page 13

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View 121 - 130 results for Wally comic strips. Discover the best "Wally" comics from Dilbert.com.

What Winning Feels Like

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What Winning Feels Like - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, office workers, regression, analysis, failure, business, common

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dilbert: i did a regression analysis to find out which variables are common to all of our failures. wally: it's me isn't it? dilbert pointing to boss: no, it's him. wally: is this what winning feels like?

Conference Call

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Conference Call - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags office workers, business, conference call, meeting, useful, don't care

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wally: how did your conference call go? dilbert: normal. it took us twenty minutes to get everyone connected, followed by forty minutes of garbled speech that no one understood. the meeting ended when everyone got tired of pretending something useful was happening. wally: i didn't really care.

Wally Compared To A Placebo

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Wally Compared To A Placebo - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, project, failure, coincidence, placebo, insult

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boss: wally, i've noticed that every project you have worked on has failed. is that a coincidence? wally: it's hard to know. unless you compare me to a placebo. boss: okay, you're worse than a placebo. wally: i thought that would take longer.

Learning What Doesn't Work

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Learning What Doesn't Work - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, project, fail, failure, business

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wally in meeting: my project failed miserably, but i think we can agree we came out ahead. for example, we learned what does not work boss: you? wally: that's one way to look at it.

Two Places At Once

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Two Places At Once - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, business, meeting, time, states, impossible

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dilbert: you committed me to two different meetings at the same time in different states. it is not possible to be in two places at the same time wally: pfft! i could do it boss: even wally could do it

Business Agility Influencer

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Business Agility Influencer - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags office workers, business, agility, solution, meaningless, useless

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ted: hi, i'm a business agility influencer and solutionist wally: i don't think that means anything ted: why are you the first person to spot that? wally: because i'm useless too!

Self Reliant

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Self Reliant - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, business, project, teamwork, help, teach, self-reliant

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boss to wally: ted says you wouldn't help him on his project. wally: i was teaching him how to be self-reliant. that's important too, isn't it? not such an easy question, is it?

Bad News I Can't Tell You

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Bad News I Can't Tell You - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags angry, employees, frustrated, news, office workers

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Carol: I have bad news. Dilbert: What is it? Carol: I'll tell you later. Dilbert: Why can't you tell me now? Carol: I don't want to start and then get interrupted if someone comes in the room. Dilbert: How bad is the news? Carol: It's bad. Very bad. Dilbert: You're making me crazy, how can I relax knowing some terrible news is out there? Don't tell me you have bad news if you aren't going to tell me what it is!!! Wally: What did I miss? Dilbert: I don't know!

Wally Has Skills

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Wally Has Skills - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, performance, review, robot, design, skills

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boss: wally, your performance is substandard. wally: give me a great performance review, or else i'll design a robot that will take your job. boss: you could do that? wally: i have the skills. i just don't like to use them.

Filled Bathtub To The Attic

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Filled Bathtub To The Attic - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, business, bathtub, home, weekend, water, attic, chimney

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boss: i forgot i was filling my bathtub and went away for the weekend. now my house is full of water all the way to the attic. i don't know what to do. wally: try putting a hose in the chimney and sucking.