Money Comic Strips - Page 13
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612 Results for Money
View 121 - 130 results for money comic strips. Discover the best "Money" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday March 14,
2015
Wally Is Not Hungry To Succeed
Tags mentor, mentoring, protege, wages, executives, ceos, compensation, work ethic, success, money
Transcript
CEO: I've been mentoring you for a week. Do you feel different? Wally: Yes. Spending time with you makes me feel underpaid. CEO: And that makes you hungry to succeed? Wally: I don't even see how those things are connected.
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Wednesday March 11,
2015
How To Make Money While Adding No Value
Tags ceos, mentor, mentors, mentoring, protege, success, merit, qualification, luck money, wages, earning, earn, money, salary
Transcript
CEO Mentors Wally. CEO: How would you like me to mentor you, underling? Wally: Can you teach me how to make $25 million per year while adding no value to the company? CEO: I don't know how to teach you that. Wally: Was it all luck or did you have to kill people?
Saturday March 07,
2015
Alice Is Highest Paid Engineer
Tags discrimination, money, salary, sexism, violence, wages, Women, highest paid, sciccors, mallet, reputation
Transcript
Alice: I'm the highest-paid engineer in the department now. Dilbert: Does it have anything to do with those scissors, the mallet, and your reputation for violence? Alice: Would you ask a man that question? Dilbert: Gaaa!!! It's like a super-power!
Friday March 06,
2015
Male Parts And Nothing Can Change It
Tags discrimination, fairness, money, salary, sexism, wages, Women, male body parts
Transcript
CEO: I explained to Alice why I earn more than she does, but she refuses to understand. I'm taller and I have male reproductive body parts. That's what stockholders care about, and nothing can change that. (Alice whistles as she walks with a pair of scissors and a mallet.)
Thursday March 05,
2015
Tall People And Men
Tags discrimination, frustration, money, retribution, revenge, salary, sexism, wages, Women
Transcript
Alice: How can you justify paying me less than tall people and men!!! CEO: Duh. The reason is that you are not as tall and you don't have male body parts. Alice: Can I borrow your scissors?
Wednesday March 04,
2015
Ceo Inflates His Own Head
Tags bonus, ceos, competition, executives, height, money, salary, wages
Transcript
Catbert: Now that our policy is to pay people based on height, your CEO salary is capped, too. CEO: That's what you think. Watch what happens when I hold my nose and close my mouth and blow. Catbert: Well, I guess it only needs to last until bonus season.
Tuesday March 03,
2015
Tall People Earn More
Tags anger, discrimination, fairness, height, money, salary, wages, Women, tall people, short people, performance reviews, height accordingly, female workers
Transcript
CEO: Studies show that tall people earn more than shorter people. So instead of doing performance reviews this year, we'll just measure your height and pay accordingly. And, of course, Alice will earn ten percent less than the men. I think that's a law.
Monday March 02,
2015
Wally Wears Heels
Tags height, money, salary, short, tall, wages, clogs, four inch heels, income per year, lump sum, each heel inch
Transcript
Wally: You might have noticed that I'm wearing clogs with four-inch heels. Studies show that every inch of height is worth $1,000 in income per year. Can I have my $4,000 in a lump sum this year? Boss: I know there is something wrong with this...
Thursday February 26,
2015
Asok Loses Money On Boss's Advice
Tags Advice, experience, stock market, lost savings, past perfromance, further returns, money
Transcript
Asok: I followed your investment advice and lost all of my savings in the stock market. Boss: Did I mention that past performance is not an indication of future returns. Asok: Then... how does "advice" actually work? Boss: It only works for the people that give it.
Wednesday February 25,
2015
Asok The Stock Picking Genius
Tags day trader, greed, investing, luck, money, stock market, stocks
Transcript
Asok: I bought my first stock and it went up five percent in one week!That means I'm a stock-picking genius. I plan to max out all of my credit cards and become a day-trader. Dilbert: The total market is up six percent. Asok: That's just luck. It can't do that forever.

