Terrorit Training Campo Comic Strips - Page 13
144 Results for Terrorit Training Campo
View 121 - 130 results for terrorit training campo comic strips. Discover the best "Terrorit Training Campo" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share April 29, 1996's comic on:
Catbert stands behind Wally's desk and says, "I've come to give you 'employee orientation,' Wally." Wally says, "But I've worked here for years." Catbert says, "You still have a glimmer of hope. You'll have to watch this mandatory training video." Wally sits in front of a television and VCR. The video begins, "So, you still have hope . . ." Catbert massages Wally's temples and says, "Relax . . . Let it go."
Share April 02, 1996's comic on:
Dilbert sits at his desk and Dogbert sits on the desk behind him. Dilbert says, "I wish I had an Ivy League degree so I could be promoted to vice president." Dogbert responds, "You don't need one." Dilbert says, "It's impossible to be a vice president without one." Dogbert says, "I'll bet $100 I can turn a rat into a vice president." Dogbert and Ratbert stand in front of a mirror. Dogbert says, "That was good, but try saying it as though your soul just abandoned your body." Ratbert says, "We've reorganized to focus on our core competency."
Share April 01, 1996's comic on:
The Boss, Dilbert, Wally and Alice sit at a conference table. The Boss says, "In an effort to boost sales, laptop computers have been given to every member of the sales force." Wally says, "That could be a problem, given the recent cuts to the training budget." The caption says, "Meanwhile, in the field." A salesperson holds up a laptop and says to a client, "And if you order today, I'll throw in this rectangular plastic thing."
Share December 01, 1995's comic on:
The Boss speaks to three employees in tech support. He says, "We just shipped our newest product. You folks in tech support will need to be trained so you can avoid any embarrassments." The Boss says, "We had a monk write the training material on a grain of rice. We could only afford one, so you'll have to share it." The Boss tosses a grain of rice at them and they lunge for it. As the employees fall to the floor fighting, the Boss says, "To be honest, I'm not sure we had a real monk. He wrote everything in Pig Latin."
Share October 04, 1995's comic on:
Dogbert sits in the cockpit of an airplane. He says, "Attention, passenger." Dogbert continues, "I'm Captain Dogbert. This is my first flight. I'll bet you wish you hadn't cut the corporate training budget." The passenger, the CEO of the company, looks shocked. Dogbert continues, "For safety, keep an eye out the window . . . If it looks like we're gonna hit the ground, try jumping up right before impact." The passenger looks scared.
Share June 11, 1995's comic on:
Tags #three day workshop, #sahring, #form teams, #paper airplanes, #blindfolded, #flight, #unconditional love, #co workers, #accountants, #marketers, #secreatries, #competitive lion, #workload, #eraser pilot, #group hug
An instructor stands at the front of a room and says, "Let's go around the circle and share what we learned in the three-day workshop." Wally, Dilbert and Alice sit together. Wally says, "At first I thought it was a waste of our training budget . . ." Wally says, "Then you asked us to form teams and make paper airplanes while blindfolded . . ." Wally turns to Dilbert and says, "I don't know if it was because of the darkness or the way we shared our thoughts about flight . . ." Wally says, "But suddenly I found unconditional love for my co-workers. Be they accountants, be they marketeers or be they secretaries." Wally stands on his chair and says, "As a result, I've become a competitive lion, eager to pounce on my workload and increase stockholder values!!" The instructor says, "Thank you, Wally. Dilbert, what did you learn?" Dilbert says, "I learned that you shouldn't put a little eraser-pilot in your paper airplane." Wally says, "Somebody needs a group hug."
Share June 10, 1995's comic on:
Wally stands in front of the Boss's desk. Wally demands, "You've got to increase the budget for training!" The Boss responds, "If I train you, then wouldn't you just leave the company to make more money working for our competitor?" Wally says, "I guess there is a downside." The Boss asks, "And the downside would be . . . ?"
Share May 30, 1995's comic on:
The Boss asks Dilbert, "Have you taken the mandatory training for business ethics?" Dilbert answers, "No. But if you SAY I did then you'll save some money on training which you can spend to decorate your office." The Boss says, "Luckily, I haven't taken the training myself." Dilbert says, "I hear it's mostly common sense anyway."
Share December 13, 1994's comic on:
Ratbert walks behind Dilbert who is carrying a briefcase. Ratbert says, "I'm following you to work." Ratbert continues, "I'll start out as an annoying rodent but with hard work and training I'll work my way up to engineer." Dilbert says, "May I suggest a career in marketing?" Ratbert holds up his tiny briefcase and says, "Is this the cutest little briefcase or what?!"
Share July 09, 1994's comic on:
"As my dogumentary begins, we see the engineer hard at work." "Suddenly, he leaps into action! Years of training and experience come into focus!" "The screen saver has been deactivated. But doubt sets in...was there a better way?" "I should have moved the mouse."