Enhance Strategy Comic Strips - Page 13
175 Results for Enhance Strategy
View 121 - 130 results for enhance strategy comic strips. Discover the best "Enhance Strategy" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share March 09, 2009's comic on:
The boss says, "your PowerPoint slides impressed the executives so much that they're changing our entire strategy." Dilbert says, "Those slides were nothing but a bunch of garbage dressed up to look good." The boss says, "And that's what our new product line will be!" Dilbert says, "Oh."
Share April 15, 2009's comic on:
The boss says, "I'm hiring you because you're huge and scary." The boss says, "Our economic forecast calls for the emergence of warlords in 2010." The boss says, "Have you ever pillaged?" Man says, "No, I just go on fake interviews to scope out targets."
Share May 04, 2009's comic on:
Carol says, "I live in a rented trailer, and all of my money is in my checking account." Carol says, "Your investments are worthless and your mortgage is underwater. My net worth is higher than yours now." Carol says, "I guess promiscuity and a G.E.D. was a pretty good strategy for me after all."
Share May 23, 2009's comic on:
Dogbert the CEO versus the MBA Man says, "My analysis doesn't support your strategy." Dogbert says, "My analysis says I can hire there high school dropouts to slap you until it does." Man says, "No?please, not dropouts!" Dogbert says, "They will kick your assumptions."
Share June 11, 2009's comic on:
Dogbert the CEO Dogbert says, "We'll execute our strategy in the usual way." Dogbert says, "The powerful will delegate to the untalented until failure is achieved." The boss says, "How long will that take?" Dogbert says, "We just finished."
Share September 09, 2009's comic on:
Dilbert says, "According to my analysis, all future ideas are already covered by over-general patents." Dilbert says, "Our best strategy is to get out of this business and become trademark infringement lawyers." The boss says, "I don't know how to be a lawyer." Catbert says, "That only matters if you take cases on a contingency basis."
Share March 12, 2011's comic on:
Wally says, "I can't help you because I'm busy working on a social network strategy for our global supply chain." Man says, "That sounds like something that no one wants and no one needs." Wally says, "That's probably why it's taking so long."
Share September 20, 2009's comic on:
Strategy Meeting Man says, "The weak economy is limiting our strategic options." Man says, "I won't sugarcoat anything." Man says, "Option one is a long slide to oblivion." Oblivion Man says, "Option two is a death spiral." Man says, "Our new company logo is a man getting sucked into a toilet." Man says, "Our revised mission statememnt is 'Forage during daylight. Hide at night.'" Man says, "I'll pass out clubs, and you can decide among yourselves how to downsize by fifty percent." Wally says, "Is it just me or was it better when they sugarcoated?"
Share November 07, 2007's comic on:
Share November 27, 2005's comic on:
Our new business strategy is... "Hold on." "I made a list of all of our strategies for the past five years." "There have been seventeen of them." "What does that tell us?" "That I'm not afraid of change." "And that I've been working hard and I deserve a huge bonus." "And that I'm kind and generous and good looking." "You have to give him credit. The man knows how to answer a rhetorical question."