Get Fired Comic Strips - Page 13

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139 Results for Get Fired

View 121 - 130 results for get fired comic strips. Discover the best "Get Fired" comics from Dilbert.com.

Ceo Gets Rehired

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Ceo Gets Rehired - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 21, 2014's comic on:


Tags #dancing, #executives, #firing, #payback, #revenge, #vengeance, #rehired, #ceo, #security videos, #happy dance, #spasms

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CEO: Good news! I got rehired as CEO! I checked the security videos for the day I got fired, and not I'm getting revenge on anyone who did a happy dance. Dilbert: Did I...? CEO: Frankly, I can't tell. Do you have spasms?

Alice Uses Social Media

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Alice Uses Social Media - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 15, 2015's comic on:


Tags #social media, #twitter, #careers, #competition, #deception, #trick, #flame, #internet, #technology

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Alice: Well, Ted, it looks like you and I are competing for the same promotion. My plan is to use social media to make you look bad. Catbert: I fired Ted for trash-talking you on Twitter. Alice: I don't have a social media account and it still works!

Ceo Wants To Fire Dilbert

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Ceo Wants To Fire Dilbert - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 31, 2015's comic on:


Tags #laziness, #firing, #fired, #termination, #identity, #fake identity, #alias, #nom de guerre, #deception

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Boss: Our CEO ordered me to fire you for embarrassing him at a meeting But that would be inconvenient for me. So... I'm going to call you Carlos from now on. And it would help if you grew a beard and walked with a limp.

Managing Your Boss

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Managing Your Boss - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 21, 2016's comic on:


Tags #management, #accountability, #blame, #time, #time management

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Boss: Your project is three weeks behind schedule. Dilbert: That's the exact amount of time I was waiting for you to answer my questions. Boss: You need to manage me better. Dilbert: Okay, you're fired.

Dilbert Recommends Firing Ted

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Dilbert Recommends Firing Ted - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 03, 2016's comic on:


Tags #money, #cost, #fired, #layoff, #suggestion

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Boss: We need to cut our expenses. Dilbert: I recommend eliminating Ted's job. Ted: What??? I recommend eliminating Dilbert's job! Just because he said it first??? Boss: Let's not over-analyze it.

Tina Isn't An Engineer

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Tina Isn't An Engineer - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 06, 2016's comic on:


Tags #engineer, #evaluation, #value, #catch-22, #fired, #termination, #engineering

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Boss: The company makes me rank all of my employees. I put you last because you're not an engineer. I have to fire whoever is ranked lowest, and I can't afford to lose any engineers. Tina; What if I work harder, and do a great job? Boss: Then I'd fire you for not being a team player.

Fire The Bottom Ten Percent

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Fire The Bottom Ten Percent - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 07, 2016's comic on:


Tags #rank, #hierarchy, #value, #fired, #termination, #layoff, #logic, #executives

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CEO: I want you to fire the employees you ranked in the bottom ten percent. Boss: Wouldn't that just put someone else in the bottom ten percent? CEO: Everything made sense until you started talking. Boss: Sorry.

Talking About The Last Job

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Talking About The Last Job - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 10, 2016's comic on:


Tags #personality, #comparing, #employees, #dumb, #business, #psychology

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Man: I will now compare my last job to this one because it is all I ever talk about. Everyone was so much smarter at my old job. Fuh-fuh-fuh-fuh. Dilbert: I assume that's why they fired you. Man: Lucky guess.

Bought His Last Company

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Bought His Last Company - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 12, 2016's comic on:


Tags #comparison, #comparing, #merger, #acquisition, #liquidation, #layoff, #redundancy, #big business, #competition, #darwin

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Man: That's now how we did it at my prior company. Boss: We bought your old company, fired all of the employees, and discontinued all of its products. Man: How is that possible? Boss: It's called "survival of the fittest." It's just science.

Coaching Ted

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Coaching Ted - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 11, 2017's comic on:


Tags #quitting, #fired, #annoy, #irritate, #drive away, #repel

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Boss: Ted, you have not performed up to my expectations, so I thought I would spend more time coaching you. I'll be with you every minute of the day. Ted: I quit! Catbert: I told you that would work. Boss: I didn't want to believe it.