Necklace Computer Comic Strips - Page 13
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634 Results for Necklace Computer
View 121 - 130 results for necklace computer comic strips. Discover the best "Necklace Computer" comics from Dilbert.com.
Friday September 26,
2003
Tags #engineer, #moved to marketing, #lisa, #old apple computer, #old wife, #engineering
Transcript
Man: I was an engineer before I moved to marketing. Now I don't remember how to turn on my lisa, Dilbert: You have an old lisa computer from apple? Man: Old wife.
Thursday January 01,
2004
Tags #office relocation, #procedures, #wrong cubicle, #easily stealable, #move computer, #rules and regulations, #company rules
Transcript
Office relocation. Esok: you are not allowed to move you own computer. It must be left in an easily sealable condition for three days until the movers take it to the wrong cubicle. Then untrained I.T Professionals will shove an ethernet cable and stapler and call it good. Dilbert: get out of my way
Wednesday January 07,
2004
Tags #stolen computer, #boss takes, #employee, #work, #unjust
Transcript
The Boss: It's time to go power shopping. The boss: Nice computer. did you just get it. GAAA!!! The Boss: shopping always puts me in a good mood.
Friday February 06,
2004
Tags #compnay, #synonymous with crime, #incompetence, #new logo, #computer graohics, #crime
Transcript
"Dogbert Consults." Dogbert: "Your company has become synonymous with incompetence and crime." "Stop trying to be all things to all people. Focus on either the incompetence OR the crime." "For your new logo, I used computer graphics to create a composite face that looks totally incompetent." "Wow."
Wednesday June 09,
2004
Tags #pantless prima donna, #alert patent offcie, #hardware, #computer, #technology
Transcript
"Pantless prima donna" "May I ask you a question?" "Silence, fool!" "Alert the patent office that I am about to begin. They might want to increase staff." "Maybe you should turn on your computer." "I don't do hardware."
Wednesday August 01,
2012
Tags #computers & peripherals, #intelligence agencies, #national security, #unnamed government agency, #shadowy guy, #create computer virus, #elbonian missile factories
Transcript
Loud Howard: This shadowy guy is from an unnamed government agency!!! He wants us to create a computer virus to attach Elbonian missile factories!!! Dilbert: Is he from our government, Loud Howard? Loud Howard: Is that important?
Saturday January 15,
2005
Tags #slow computer, #uogarde, #cost benefit analysis, #vice president approval
Transcript
Dilbert: "My computer is too slow. I need to upgrade it." The Boss: "I need a cost benefit analysis including the cost of all alternatives, and vice president approval." Dilbert: "It was easier to get a second job and pay for the upgrade myself."
Saturday April 09,
2005
Tags #no budget, #no staff, #wits and computer, #wits, #pencil
Transcript
Dilbert: "I might have no budget and no staff to help me on my project, but that doesn't matter." "Because all I need are my wits and my computer." The Boss: "My computer is too slow. I'm taking yours." Dilbert: "My wits and... this pencil." The boss: "Hey, isn't that my pencil?"
Friday April 22,
2005
Tags #computer freeze, #possible fixes, #possible combination, #no guaretntee, #lazy
Transcript
Hello. My crashinbox computer keeps freezing up. "There are 25 possible fixes but they must be tried in every combination." "That's 625 things I'd have to try with no guarantee that any of it will work." "So you're saying you're lazy."
Saturday May 28,
2005
Tags #tech support, #bad computer, #designed to be slower, #unrelaible, #defragment, #disk drive
Transcript
"Dogbert's Tech Support " You have a bad case of computer rot." "Your computer is designed to become slower and more unreliable over time so you have to upgrade." "But if you'd like some false hope, I can tell you to defragment your disk drive."