Next Year Comic Strips - Page 13
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881 Results for Next Year
View 121 - 130 results for next year comic strips. Discover the best "Next Year" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday April 30,
2001
Tags next generation, internet project, cute single women, low standard
Transcript
Wally, sitting between the boss and Dilbert, says, "My next generation internet project is right on schedule." Wally says, "It'll be done sometime in the next generation." Wally continues, "If you know any cute single women with low standards, it would really help."
Tuesday August 07,
2001
Tags rave review, buy review, new movie, afford, full price range, new years day, best comedy so far, this year
Transcript
A Hollywood type says into the telephone, "Hello.. Yes, I'd like to buy a rave review for my new movie." Dogbert, on the other end of the line, replies, "Can you afford the 'suspenseful thrill ride' or would you like something more in the 'delightful' price range." The man responds, "I'm releasing it on New Year's Day, Can you give me a price for 'Best Comedy So Far This Year?'"
Wednesday April 03,
2002
Tags next speaker, athlete, drugs, booze, inspirational
Transcript
The Boss says into a microphone, "Our next speaker was a famous athlete until drugs and booze ruined his life." A shaky, disheveled man walks towards The Boss and says, "Shank Hew Vewy Mush." Alice turns to The Boss and says, "It's not inspirational until he stops doing those things." The Boss asks, "What?"
Thursday April 04,
2002
Tags 3 year anniversary, first meeting, project requirements, probelm
Transcript
Dilbert addresses a meeting, "Today is the three-year anniversary of our first meeting to discuss project requirements." Dilbert continues, "And we're still discussing requirements. Does anyone else see a problem here?" A coworker turns to Dilbert and says, "When you're done, can we talk about requirements?"
Monday July 15,
2002
Tags 30 thousand employees, emails jokes per week, file bankruptcy, lost prodcutivity, ten million, holding employee responsible
Transcript
Catbert says to Tina, "Tina, our records show that you forward an average of nineteen e-mail jokes per week." Catbert continues, "Each joke goes to 30,000 employees, costing us ten million per year in lost productivity." Catbert concludes, "We plan to blame you when we file for bankruptcy next week." Tina is visibly worried.
Monday August 26,
2002
Tags five year plan, compared to plan, dust heap, history, education
Transcript
The Boss pulls a file out of his drawer and thinks, "What's this? It's our old five- year plan!" He opens the file and thinks, "I wonder how we did compared to the plan." The Boss approaches Dilbert and asks, "Have we relegated Microsoft to the dust heap of history?" Dilbert responds, "Shhh! They might hear!"
Tuesday August 27,
2002
Tags accounting irregularities, five year plan, five years ago, investigated, prophetic, 5 year assessment
Transcript
The Boss says to Wally and Dilbert, "I found or five-year plan from five years ago." The Boss continues, "The last page says, "At the end of the fifth year, the entire management team will be..." The Boss continues to read, "... investigated for accounting irregularities." Wally looks at the secret service agent who has just entered and says, "Spooky."
Friday November 01,
2002
Tags dogcart attorney, too late, change, punish client, expect awkward silences, next break
Transcript
Headline: Dogbert the Attorney. Dogbert raises his hand and says, "Your honor, is it too late to change sides?" Dogbert continues, "After hearing the evidence, I want to punish my client." After a pause, Dogbert asks, "No?" The Boss glares at Dogbert. Dogbert continues, "I expect some awkward silences during the next break."
Wednesday April 16,
2003
Tags excellent all year, rating poor, paper trail, fire you, surge of motivation, feedback
Transcript
Asok is meeting with The Boss. The Boss says, "Asok, your work has been excellent all year." The Boss continues, "I'm rating you 'poor' so I'll have a paper trail in case I ever need to fire you." Asok sobs and crumples his evaluation. The Boss says, "You'll probably feel a little surge of motivation because you got feedback."
Tuesday April 29,
2003
Tags corporations, ignore, jumpy tactics, laid off, you might be next, your imagination
Transcript
Dilbert is at home. He says to Dogbert, "I'm seeing signs that I might get laid off." Dogbert responds, "It's probably your imagination. Just ignore them." Catbert and The Boss are hanging an arrow-shaped sign that reads, "You might be next" on Dilbert's cubicle. Catbert says, "I have to admit that I like it when they're jumpy."