Stopped Coming Comic Strips - Page 13

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

217 Results for Stopped Coming

View 121 - 130 results for stopped coming comic strips. Discover the best "Stopped Coming" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #illusion of value, #meeting, #obvious, #maintain illusion, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: It's obvious what I need to do next. But I'll let you tell me so you can maintain the illusion of value. The Boss: stop being this way. Dilbert: I saw that coming a mile away."

Dilbert Characters

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #adventurer, #alternate universe, #billionaire, #evolution, #kills the strong, #south pole, #universe

View Transcript

Transcript

Anti-Dilbert says, "In my alternate universe, the one we call Wally is a billionaire entrepreneur and adventurer." Anti-Dilbert says, "No one has seen him since he tried to swim to the south pole." Anti-Dilbert says, "In my universe, evolution kills the strong." Wally says, "Sounds like he had it coming."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #thank ceo, #meeting, #wearing costumes, #unreliable, #moved your cheese, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "I'd like to thank our CEO for coming to our meeting." Dilbert says, "You said everyone would be wearing costumes today." Wally says, "I'm unreliable." Dilbert says, "I kind of hate you now." Wally says, "Geez, who moved your cheese?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #focus group, #surprise, #chair, #sleeping gas, #plotting

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "How's the focus group coming along?" Dilbert says, "They don't like us. They're plotting to storm our observation room." The Boss says, "Release the sleeping gas." Dilbert says, "CHAIR!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #control men, #plan, #exaggerate, #overwork, #overextend, #yell, #important, #panic, #coffee

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice says, "I learned to control men by exaggerating the importance of my projects and overextending myself." Alice says, "Our most important customer is coming and I won't be ready on time unless you fetch me some coffee!" Alice says, "In phase two, I make you enjoy it."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #patent application, #surprise, #upset, #angry, #yell, #negative space, #credit

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "I added my name to your patent application." Dilbert says, "What?" The Boss says, "I could have stopped you from working on it, but I didn't. I'm like an artist who understands negative space." The Boss says, "Do you know what negative space is, Dilbert?" Dilbert says, "I'm living in it!!!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #stockholder, #meeting, #budget, #waste money, #panic attack, #pucker face, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Stockholder says, "Hi ho! I'm a common stockholder. I'm here to see how my investment is coming along." The Boss says, "Okay, first on the agenda, we need to blow our budget before year end so we don't get less money next year." The Boss says, "How many ten-dollar mouse pads can we get for $10,000?" Stockholder says, "I hope this is a panic attack."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #film, #hate, #superheros, #geeks, #robots, #diseases, #weddings, #tears, #mammals, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "Amber, would you like to see a movie that one of us will undoubtedly hate?" Dilbert says, "I only like movies with superheroes, geeks or robots. You probably only like movies with tears, diseases and weddings." Dilbert says, "Does my honesty turn you on?" Amber says, "I just stopped liking mammals."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #eating, #customers, #angry, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says, "Thanks for coming on short notice. I called this meeting because?" Wally says, "?Company policy allows me to order donuts for any meeting that includes customers." Wally says, "I don't work on commission."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #assignment, #realization, #angry, #useless, #meaningless, #breakdown, #screaming, #yelling, #ignoring

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss says, "Asok, I want to scrub the CPS database." Asok says, "No one uses that data." Asok the intern says, "But you are incapable of admitting error. So now I must dedicate my time to a thoroughly useless task." The boss thinks, "This job got easier when I stopped listening." Asok says, "It's like death, but without the glamour!"