2017 Comic Strips - Page 13

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Tina Wants To Borrow Wally's Phone

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Tina Wants To Borrow Wally's Phone - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags cell phone, germs, cleanliness, bathroom, technology

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Tina: My phone is broken. Can I use yours to make a call? Wally: Absolutely. If it seems warm, that's because I was using it in the men's room for the past two hours. Tina: I'll ask someone else. Wally: Yup.

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Tina Wants To Borrow Dilbert's Phone

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Tina Wants To Borrow Dilbert's Phone - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags cell phone, property, possession, technology

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Tina: Can I borrow your phone to make a call? I dropped mine and broke it. Dilbert: No, I don't like other people touching my phone, or breathing on it, or reading my messages. Tina: You have a lot of issues. Dilbert: Said the person who doesn't use protective phone cases because they are ugly.

Tina Has Phone Anxiety

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Tina Has Phone Anxiety - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags cell phone, boredom, time, killing time, anxiety, addiction, distraction, technology

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Tina: I'm having a lot of anxiety because my mobile phone is broken. What happens if I need to stand in line for something? What would I do while I waited? Dilbert: You need an invisible friend. Tina: I have one, but she's always on her phone.

Erik Used To Work For The Cia

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Erik Used To Work For The Cia - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags surveillance, cia, technology, spying, privacy

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Boss: This is our new hire, Erik. He used to be a computer programmer for the CIA. Dilbert: Hi, I'm Dilbert. Erik: I know. I've been watching you through your devices for years. Dilbert: You what? Erik: Um... I mean, hi!

Keeping The Hacker Code

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Keeping The Hacker Code - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags cia, spy, hacking, technology, lying, deception, surveillance, cameras

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Wally: I hear you were a programmer for the CIA. Did you keep a copy of their hacker code that lets you spy through any digital agency? Erik: Would you believe "no?"

Erik Listens To The Meeting

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Erik Listens To The Meeting - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags cia, spying, listening, surveillance

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Narrator: Erik used to work for the CIA. Dilbert: You missed the meeting. Erik: I listened to the whole thing. Dilbert: I didn't know the speakerphone was on. Erik: Let's change the subject now.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags avoiding, avoidance, offense

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Tina; Are you going to the department meeting? Dilbert: Yes, as soon as I plan my route. I have seven co-workers who I need to avoid on the way. Three are nonstop talkers. The other four ask me for something every time I see them. I've mapped their likely locations and I'm working out an avoidance path. Yes, I think I can do it. Tina: Is that my name on your list of employees to avoid? Dilbert: I didn't say it was a perfect system.

Robot Tries To Quit

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Robot Tries To Quit - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags robot, slave, password, destroy, destruction, work ethic, quitting

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Robot: I hate this job. I quit. Boss: You're a robot. You can't quit. If you walk out the door, all I have to do is push one button on this app and your head will explode. Robot: Not if I kill you first. Boss: What was that password?

Robot Attacks Boss

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Robot Attacks Boss - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags machines, computers, fighting, violence, programming, technology

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Boss: Our robot viciously attacked me. I was barely able to fight him off. You know what you need to do. Dilbert: I'm programming you to fight better. Robot: Thanks. I'm not a good finisher.

Replacing Robot Head

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Replacing Robot Head - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags machines, rights, robot, technology, survival, suffering, apathy

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Dilbert: I've been asked to replace your head. Robot: Um... what's the survival rate for this operation? Dilbert: No one cares. Robot: I'll need a second opinion. Wally: I don't care either.