Long Nose Comic Strips - Page 14

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

434 Results for Long Nose

View 131 - 140 results for long nose comic strips. Discover the best "Long Nose" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, fanfare, sorrowful, friends, bye, lab

View Transcript

Transcript

Ratbert says, "I must get back to the lab now. But please, no long goodbyes, or parting gifts, or fanfare." Ratbert continues, "Nay, let us simply drink in the richness of this beautiful yet sorrowful moment. Two friends who . . ." Dogbert interrupts, "'Bye." Ratbert says, "That's what I meant to say: 'bye."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags turtle, pet, Dogbert, complete, application, lived, shell

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: Before I can consider you as my pet turtle, you must complete this application. Turtle: Okay, if that's your policy... "How long have you lived in your current shell?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags bad stocks, disclose holdings, money, newsletter, stock market, stock picker, traded stocks, pumpanddump

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: I'm starting a pump-and-dump newsletter for thinly traded stocks. It's legal as long as I disclose my holdings and my bad stock picks can be attributed to honest mistakes. Meet my stock picker. Coworker: All shhtocks go up!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dogbert, Dilbert, confirmation, hearing, supreme court, senator, starve, death, downside

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits in his chair watching Dogbert's confirmation hearing on television. A voice says, "The senator has 34 seconds . . ." Dilbert thinks, "I wonder what would happen if you let them talk as long as they wanted." Dilbert thinks, "I'll bet they'd starve to death. But there's probably a downside."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, electric, razor, burn, face, joke, toaster, shave, problem

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits in his chair reading the newspaper and Dogbert stands on the hassock. Dogbert says, "Do you know the difference between an electric razor and a toaster?" Dilbert replies, "No." Dogbert says, "No??? Geez, it must take you a long time to shave. Do you burn your face a lot?" Dilbert says, "I thought you were telling a joke." Dogbert asks, "How long have you had this problem?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Wally, nardo, old country, personal space, hands, pockets

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says to Dilbert, "Uh-oh, Nardo is coming. I'm out of here." Nardo and Dilbert stand nose-to-nose. Dilbert says, "Uh, hi, Nardo." Nardo says, "In the old country we did not have what you call personal space." Dilbert says, "Take your hands out of my pockets." Nardo says, "Oh, I get it. They're for your use only, right?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dogbert, elves, elf, magic, elf magic, conquer, world, pick, Card, serious, clubs, forty three of clubs

View Transcript

Transcript

An elf says to three other elves, "I say we elves have been pushed around too long!" The elf says, "Let's use our elf magic to conquer the world!!" Another elf replies, "Yeah! Elf magic!" An elf holds a deck of playing cards and says to Dogbert, "C'mon, pick a card - any card!! And this time be serious!!" Dogbert says, "I'll take the forty-three of clubs."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, the boss, assignment, last, ridiculous, spontaneously, channeling, spirit, bozo

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at his desk. The Boss enters Dilbert's cubicle and says, "Uh . . . Dilbert, about that assignment I gave you last month . . ." The Boss continues, "Remember how you thought it was a silly and ridiculous assignment?" Dilbert says, "Yeah?" The Boss replies, "Well, it turns out that I've been spontaneously channeling the spirit of Bozo the Clown." The Boss is suddenly wearing a clown nose and costume.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, boss, report, reading, anything, sit, feeling, bottles, beer, wall

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits across from the Boss's desk thinking, "I sit here motionless while the Boss reads my report." Dilbert thinks, "I can't talk while he's reading, and I don't have anything of my own to read . . ." The Boss reads the report and thinks, "I wonder how long I can make him sit there feeling uncomfortable?" Dilbert sings to himself, "A hundred bottles of beer on the wall."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags the boss, slogan, inspire, Dilbert, quality, extra, pay, alice

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Dilbert, Wally, Brenda another employee, "What the department needs is a slogan to inspire us." The Boss continues, "Our new slogan is 'We Are Quality.'" A woman says, "Suddenly I feel like working long hours for no extra pay." The Boss says, "It's working!"