50 Dollars Comic Strips - Page 14

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View 131 - 140 results for 50 dollars comic strips. Discover the best "50 Dollars" comics from Dilbert.com.

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Google Headquarters "Isn't it a little bit evil to kill Dilbert with our death ray?" "Good point...What if I just blast the space station out of orbit and make it land on his house?" "I'll bet you ten billion dollars you can't." "And the lower has to introduce himself as 'the dumb one.'"

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Dogbert the Lobbyist "For a million dollars I can have the government include your industrial waste in the recommended food pyramid." "For another million I'll have Congress authorize huge tax breaks for soulless, Blackberry-using weasels with coffee breath." "I just want to hug you!" "That's another million."

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Executive Compensation Review Board "How much should we pay our CEO if he just shows up for work?" "FIFTY MILLION DOLLARS!!!" honk honk "The clown makes a good argument." "Aye!"

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Our sales guy vastly underbid a job. Now it's my project to install the system in a way that's profitable. "Blame your customer for underspecifying the features then charge her through the nose for change orders." "Three million dollars for an electrical plug?" "The base model uses a potato battery."

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"I found a way to save a million dollars by spending only $10,000." "The $10,000 would come out of my budget but the savings would go into someone else's budget. It's not feasible." "Our stockholders might disagree." "That's why they aren't invited to meetings."

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"Carol, you showed up for work almost every day this week. Here are some 'morale dollars'." "It's not real money, but you can redeem it for gifts and services that you don't want or need." "I also entered you into a raffle that you didn't win." HONK!

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Tags #elbonian, #factory, #million dollars, #competition, #office, #rebel attack

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Dilbert: Rebels have threatened to attack our Elbonian factory unless we give them a million dollars. The Boss: "That's outrageous! Tell them their competition offered to not attack us for half that price." Negotiations begin Elbonian: "That wouldn't even cover our costs of not attacking!"

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Tags #happy birthday, #50 years old, #entire life, #delusional thing, #old man, #office, #computer, #aging, #dementia, #life changes, #technology

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Dilbert: "Happy birthday. What's it feel like to be 50?" "It's great! I've never felt better in my entire life!" "So it's sort of a delusional thing?" "Yes, luckily."

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Tags #tall pants, #old fashioned, #hairpiece, #glove on tail, #money to treasury, #first primary

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Dogbert: I'm wearing my tall pants and my old-fashioned hairpiece because I'm running for president. "I put a glove on my tail so I can shake 50% more hands." "My policy is to give all the money in the treasury to Iowans. But I might flip-flop after the first primary."

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Tags #stock holder meeting, #gadflies, #stock price dropped, #sleep at night

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Stockholder meeting CEO: Do we have any questions from Gadflies? You earned 72 million dollars while our stick price dropped nine percent. How can you sleep at night? CEO: ZZZZZ