Different Approach Comic Strips - Page 14

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

168 Results for Different Approach

View 131 - 140 results for different approach comic strips. Discover the best "Different Approach" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #conversation, #deception, #insincere compliments, #make likable, #didn't spill, #no change

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I read that using people's names and giving insincere compliments will make me likeable. Good job pouring that coffee, Wally. You didn't spill a drop. Wally: I don't feel any different. Dilbert: Maybe the problem is on your end.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #leadership, #smart way, #leading, #acting, #twisting, #hired idiots

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: You didn't show leadership on your project. Dilbert: Are you saying I didn't do things in a smart way? Boss: Leading is different from acting in the smartest way. Dilbert: So... either I can do things the smart way or I can be a leader like you? Boss: Stop twisting things around! You need to be smart and you need to show leadership! You can't expect your team to do what you want just because it's the smartest path. Dilbert: Remind me which one of us hired those idiots.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #executives, #obliviousness, #act like start up, #ask for funding, #hacker

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: We need to act more like a start-up. Dilbert: You mean we can ask for funding for one thing and then pivot six times and build something entirely different? CEO: Is there a version where we don't do any of that and I can still call myself a hacker?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #create itself, #execute, #executives, #obliviousness, #strategy, #succeed, #meeting, #emplyees, #discussion, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: We can only succeed if we execute. Wally: How is that different from saying we can only succeed if we succeed. CEO: There's also the strategy. Wally: Does the strategy create itself?

Wally Thinks About Strategic Planning

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Thinks About Strategic Planning - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #deception, #hallucinations, #strategic planners, #future, #pretend, #different happens, #visualize, #game, #work, #planning

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I'm thinking of getting into the strategic planning game. If I understand the job description, you basically hallucinate about the future and then something different happens. Dilbert: You also have to pretend it's useful. Wally: Really? That sounds hard.

Selling Bad Software Is Like Crime

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Selling Bad Software Is Like Crime - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #big business, #business, #criminals, #user interface, #software, #lower tax rate, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Our tests show that people can't figure out how to use our software. And yet we still sell it. How are we different from criminals? Boss: Our tax rate is lower.

Wally Is Not Hungry To Succeed

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Is Not Hungry To Succeed - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #mentor, #mentoring, #protege, #wages, #executives, #ceos, #compensation, #work ethic, #success, #money

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: I've been mentoring you for a week. Do you feel different? Wally: Yes. Spending time with you makes me feel underpaid. CEO: And that makes you hungry to succeed? Wally: I don't even see how those things are connected.

Wally Presents His Idea

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Presents His Idea - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ideas, #inventions, #thinking, #coffee, #mug, #decisions, #peer pressure, #independent thought

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I invented a coffee mug with two handles. It works from any angle of approach, accommodates larger payloads, and has handle redundancy. Alice: I can honestly say it is your best idea yet. Boss: If Alice likes it...

Removing Obstacles

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Removing Obstacles - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #hinder, #hinderance, #obstacle, #obstacles, #management, #managers, #insult, #zinger, #zing

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: My job is removing obstacles. Asok: When do you leave? Dilbert: I think he was going in a different direction.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #logic, #false logic, #imagination, #managers, #review, #performance

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I can't give you a raise because your performance was only average. Dilbert: How can you calculate an average for my performance? No one has ever been in my exact situation. Boss: I compared you to other employees. Dilbert: You compared me to strangers doing entirely different things? Boss: No, I compared you to imaginary people doing your exact job. It's called managing, and I'm very good at it. Dilbert: How do you know you're good at it? Boss: Because imaginary people do this job worse than I do.