Internet Comic Strips - Page 14

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209 Results for Internet

View 131 - 140 results for internet comic strips. Discover the best "Internet " comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags internet & world wide web, revenge, killed robot, uploaded personality, internet, decommissioned it, subroutines, haunting, technology

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Dilbert: You killed our robot. Alice: He had it coming. Dilbert: Are you aware that it uploaded its personality to the internet before you violently decommissioned it? Alice: What? Dilbert: Did you know it had subroutines for haunting, revenge, and being a jerk. Alice: What? Robot: We meet again.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags interviews, mental health, creative, adhd, dyslexia, bipolar, schizophrenia, creativity, normal is boring, turning tables, job interview

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Boss: I'm looking for an employee who is creative. Interviewee: That's me. I have ADHD and dylsexia. I'm also bipolar and schizophrenic. Dilbert: Checking the Internet... Well... that's surprising. Each of his conditions is highly correlated with creativity. Interviewee: Are you a normal? Boss: I... think so. Interviewee: Wow. I feel sorry for you. It must be hard going through life without any creativity. Boss: What's happening here? Dilbert: It might be some sort of creative thing.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags engineer, good manager, leads by example, managers & supervisors, middle manager, monster truck rallies, suspicion, teaching, education, business, engineering

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Boss: A goo manager leads by example. How does it help an engineer to see an example of how to be a middle manager? Dilbert: That's like teaching physics by showing examples of monster truck rallies. Alice: Should we say dumb things, too, or have you not started leading by example yet? Wally: Now what is he doing/ Are we supposed to do that? Dilbert: I think he's leading by example now! Boss: I'm starting to wonder if everything I read on the Internet is wrong.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags apathy, death & dying, distress, rearrange bits, already dead

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Dilbert: All I did this week was rearrange bits on the Internet. I had no real impact on the physical world. I can't rule out the possibility that I'm already dead and I don't know it. Okay, still an open question.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags ignorance (knowledge), internet & world wide web, binder, cloud

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Boss: Alan has been out of the workforce for a long time. I need you to ease him back in. Coworker: Do you have a binder of the company policies? Dilbert: It's in the cloud.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags internet & world wide web, money, bertcoins, digital currency, anonymous genous, mail, attachment, pirates

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Ratbert: I'm moning for bertcoins. It's a digital currency created by an anonymous genius. Hey, I'm getting an email from a Somali fellow who wants me to open an attachment. What happened to all of my bertcoins? Bob: Digital Somali pirates!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags internet & world wide web, loneliness, marriage, wifi, no wife, social, intellectual; needs, human contact, relationships

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Coworker: Are you married? Wally: I don't have a wife, but I do have wifi. I find that it meets all of my social and intellectual needs. Coworker: Do you miss the warmth of human contact? Wally: Never tried it. Sounds problematic.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags embarrassment, internet & world wide web, interviews, resume, old way, job interview, data online data, ew, disgust, walked out

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Boss: I don't need to see your resume. That's the old way of hiring. Now we use data from the Internet to see what you've been up to lately. Ew. Applicant: I'll show myself out. Boss: You'll understand if I don't shake your hand.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags internet & world wide web, surveillance, government databases, rest passwords, case file, face on pennies

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Wally: I thought you were on the run for hacking the government's databases. Dilbert: I was. But they forgot to reset their passwords, so I deleted my case file and gave myself a tax break. Wally: Did you get me anything? Dilbert: You're the new face on pennies.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags internet & world wide web, sales personnel, deluxe edition, store, online shopping, unnecessary warranty extenstion, digital receipt

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Dilbert: Okay, you talked me into buying the deluxe edition. Salesman: We don't have that one in stock, but I could call around to our other stores. Dilbert: Technically, that means this is not actually a store. You're more like online shopping, but with a terrible user interface. Watch me buy that same item with my phone while you stand there being obsolete. And... done. Salesman: Did they try to sell you an unnecessary warranty extension? Dilbert: No. Salesman: Yes! I still have a purpose! Dilbert: Here's my digital receipt.