Nothing To Fear Comic Strips - Page 14

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

468 Results for Nothing To Fear

View 131 - 140 results for nothing to fear comic strips. Discover the best "Nothing To Fear" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #enable intergration, #okay to do nothing?, #redesign processes, #resources and tools, #wally and boss

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss meets with Wally and Dilbert at a conference table. The boss says, "We'll redesign our processes to enable enterprise intergration of knowledge resources and tools." Wally raises his hand and says, "Question: Is it okay if I do nothing?" The boss says, "No." Wally says, "Well, excuse me for making a suggestion."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #million bucks, #pay up, #double or nothing, #won't go to work, #naked, #exact words

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert comes home from work still wearing his robe.. Dilbert says, to dogbert, "You said you'd give me a million bucks if I went to work like this. Pay up." Dogbert says, "I'll bet you double or nothing that you won't go to work totally naked." Dilbert sits naked in his cubicle and thinks, "Wait... what were his exact words?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Wally, #meeting, #does nothing, #angrily identify problems, #not job, #ambiguous, #taking forever, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss, Wally, Dilbert, and others are in a meeting. Wally raises his hand and says, "Someone should take care of that problem!" Dilbert turns to Wally and says, "YOU should take care of it." Wally replies, "I can't do everything." Alice says, "You don't do anything." Asok adds, "Not a single thing." Wally says, "It's my job to angrily identify problems." The Boss, with his head in his hands, interjects, "Wally..." The Boss continues, "This is NOT your job!" Wally asks, "What?" Wally is up in arms as he says to the Boss, "Everything is so ambiguous here! Someone should take care of that problem!" Turning to Dilbert, Wally adds, "Is it just me, or is this meeting taking forever?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #overtime, #required, #manage, #meeting, #no linger mandatory, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss meets with Asok, Wally and Dilbert. The boss says, "Overtime is no longer mandatory." The boss says, "It's required." Asok growls. The boss thinks, "I manage and I manage, but nothing seems to make them happy."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #final report, #big changes, #too cowardly, #change names, #Advice, #behind back

View Transcript

Transcript

Caption: "Dogbert the consultant" Dogbert, Wally, The Boss and Alice are at a meeting. Dogbert presents a report. Dogbert says, "This is my final report." Dogbert says to The Boss, "I'm recommending big, big changes..." The Boss reads the report. Dogbert says, "Because I know you're too cowardly to implement them." Wally says, "So...It will be our fault if nothing improves." Dogbert says, "Exactly." The Boss is excitedly reading. The Boss says, "AAAGH!! We can't do all of this!" The Boss says, "Couldn't we just change the names of all our departments?" Dogbert says, "Those imbeciles! How dare they ignore my advice!" Wally says, "You're supposed to say that to us behind our backs later." Dogbert says, "I'm in a hurry."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #free medical advice, #some exercose, #lazy hog, #wait for ipo

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert is sitting at his computer and Dilbert stands behind him. Dogbert says: "I'm creating a web site of free medical advice." Dogbert's hears stand up as he screams: "Get some exercise, you lazy hog!!" Dilbert asks Dogbert: "Is that it?" Dogbert answers: "Nothing to do now but wait for the IPO."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dogcart one hour course, #executive mba, #took money, #nothing in retrurn, #case study

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss and others are listening to Dogbert who plays the role of a teacher in front of a classroom. Dogbert says: "Welcome to the Dogbert one-hour executive MBA course." Dogbert says while wagging it's tail: "Notice that I took your money and I'm giving you almost nothing in return." Dogbert says: "That was a case study." "We have time for one more."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #charge fee, #investments, #removing tonsils, #years of training

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert investments: A co-worker and Dogbert are in a meeting. The co-worker asks Dogbert: "So, you charge a fee every year even if you do nothing?" Dogbert answers: "It takes years of training to know when to do nothing." The co-worker says: "I guess that makes sense." Dogbert hands a sheet of paper to the co-worker and says: "Here's my bill for not removing your tonsils."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dumpster service, #save money, #discovered alternative costs, #tear off piece

View Transcript

Transcript

At a meeting, the Boss announces: "I cancelled our dumpster service to save money." He continues: "I discovered an alternative that costs nothing." He tells everyone as he hands them a sheet of paper: "Everyone tear off a piece and put it in your pocket."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #company saidst, #fist of death, #note from author, #big bag, #dumpster, #disclaimer, #nothing bad happened

View Transcript

Transcript

Extremely angry, Alice approaches the sadist who sits at his computer. She rolls up her sleeves and says, "Okay,sadist, it's time to meet the fist of death. A note from the author forewarns his readers that nothing bad or violent happens to the sadist. The author's note reads: If you are the sort of person who is influenced by comic strips, I assure you nothing bad or violent happens next. Alice and the sadist discuss their differences and become lifelong friends. As Alice, Dilbert and Wally sit together eating lunch, Dilbert asks Alice "What was in that big bag I helped you drag to the dumpster?"