Stupid Misperceptions Comic Strips - Page 14
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View 131 - 140 results for stupid misperceptions comic strips. Discover the best "Stupid Misperceptions" comics from Dilbert.com.
"Hi. I'm calling to check the references of your ex-employee named Ted." "We have a company policy against giving references. But I'd be happy to discuss the weather with you." "Okay." "The clouds are moving lazily across the sky, and everyone thinks they're stupid."
I'm too busy to learn anything about the projects I'm managing. "I barely have enough time to make critical decisions about them." "Maybe you're lazy and stupid." "Let's go down to the pond and throw rocks at the ducks."
My space defense shield detects an incoming threat. I am launching intercept rockets. "Apparently the boys at Google used a death ray to blast the international space station out of orbit and toward our house." "Why do you have a space defense shield?" "Doesn't that seem like a stupid question now?"
"Dilbert, I have a little project for you to do in your spare time." "What exactly is my 'spare time'?" "Well, for example, there's the time that normal people would use for dating." "And since you're not dating, you can trim a few minutes from your hygiene schedule too." "Then there's the time you spend daydreaming about a fulfilling life." "That's exactly like stealing from the company." "And your stupid questions - Those have to take at least an hour a day." "Are my questions stupid?" "Not as bad as your answers."
We discovered that the mud in Elbonia is caused by an abundance of oil and coal near the surface. "Our country will be prosperous and happy forever unless we do something incredibly stupid." "Are you building any weapons of mass destruction?" "Why? Is that a problem?"
Your lawyer threatened to sue if I fire you for gross incompetence. So I decided to let you stay. "And we've moved to an alphabetical system for awarding 'Employee of the Month'. This is your month." "Stupid alphabet."
"I cannot decide if you are very wise or just a big stupid moron." "Well, I'll tell you, little cowpoke, when the snake falls in love with the spaghetti, it's time to buy a new hat." "You look more flustered than a barefoot squirrel at a tire store." "Gaaa!!! They almost make sense!!"