Supreme Leadership Comic Strips - Page 14

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

164 Results for Supreme Leadership

View 131 - 140 results for supreme leadership comic strips. Discover the best "Supreme Leadership" comics from Dilbert.com.

Sense Of Awe

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Sense Of Awe - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #management, #executives, #leader, #leadership, #overwork, #work ethic, #motivation

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: A good leader creates a sense of awe in employees. But I think you'll find it a lot faster to create a sense of "ow" instead. CEO: I need you to work all weekend again. Dilbert: Ow!

Hire Smarter People

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Hire Smarter People - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #leadership, #success, #insult, #power, #compliment, #backhanded compliment, #ego, #humility, #humble

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: The secret to my success is that I hire people who are smarter than me. And then I tell those smart people exactly what to do. It keeps you humble. Dilbert: Good, because all of this was starting to go to my head.

Robots Read News Of Supreme Court Ruling

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Robots Read News Of Supreme Court Ruling - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #supreme court, #partisan politics, #engineers, #morals, #legislation, #conservatism, #liberal, #guilt, #innocence

View Transcript

Transcript

Robots Read News. Robot: The Supreme Court ruled that engineers cannot be found guilty of murder. Lawyers argued that any good engineer knows how to get away with murder, so getting caught is proof of innocence. The ruling was unanimous because no one could figure out which side was the liberal one.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #logic, #reasoning, #managing, #managers, #leadership, #quality, #absurd

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: You assigned a pack of idiots to my project team. Boss: We can't afford to hire good people. Dilbert: How am I supposed to create world-class products with a team of disruptive idiots? Boss: Try working extra hard. Dilbert: You want us to be more energetic about our bad decisions? Boss: You also have to put in the hours. Dilbert: Are you saying bad decisions, plus long hours, plus lots of enthusiasm, produces great engineering? Boss: Not if you stand around yacking about it all day.

Fbi Has Been Tracking Asok

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Fbi Has Been Tracking Asok - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #terrorism, #terrorist, #radicalization, #extremism, #frustration, #manager, #leader, #fbi

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: We've been tracking an accused terrorist named Asok. We believe he was radicalized here. Woman: What did you do to him? Boss: Leadership? Man: Yup. That's the top cause.

Something About Asok Was Wrong

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Something About Asok Was Wrong - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #terrorism, #terrorist, #radicalization, #leadership, #managers, #frustration, #humor

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Where's Asok? Dilbert: The FBI took him on suspicion of being a terrorist. Boss: Now that you mention it, something about him was wrong. Dilbert: Was it his boss? Boss: Was that a joke? Dilbert: I'm not sure. I don't have a sense of humor, either.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #expectations, #unrealistic, #project, #group, #laziness, #prediction

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: When do you expect to finish your project? Dilbert: Never. Boss: That's your plan? Dilbert: No, my plan is to be done in a week. You asked me what I expect. I base my expectations on the quality of people you assigned to my project without asking my opinion. The time-wasters outnumber the productive people on the team by three to one. Under that scenario, plus your total lack of leadership, the world will end before this project does. Boss: Then why is your plan to be done in a week? Dilbert: Because you don't like it when I tell the truth. Boss: Let's compromise on two weeks. Dilbert: Can we set those two weeks on auto-renew?

Wally The Thought Leader

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally The Thought Leader - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #title, #leadership, #work ethic, #laziness, #strategy, #ruse

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Wally, can you help me... Wally: Whoa! Stop right there. I'm a thought leader, not some wage slave. Man: What do thought leaders do? Wally: You're watching it.

Boss Freestyles With Jargon

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Boss Freestyles With Jargon - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #language, #jargon, #managers, #leadership, #nonsense, #gibberish

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I forgot to make an agenda for this meeting, so I'll just freestyle it with jargon. Let's do a deep dive in the big data and drill down until we hyperlocalize some disruptive technologies. That's enough leadership. Now the rest of you need something to do.

Get Multiple Approvals

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Get Multiple Approvals - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers, #problems, #work, #frustration

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: You need to get your capital budget approved by all of the department heads. We're in the middle of a reorg, so get approval from both the outgoing and the incoming managers. Dilbert: Someday I hope to solve a problem that is not caused by leadership. Boss: You'll never get that far.