Cell Comic Strips - Page 14

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

143 Results for Cell

View 131 - 140 results for cell comic strips. Discover the best "Cell" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #worst date ever, #whats on ground, #bends over, #check out ass, #not so good

View Transcript

Transcript

Ming and Dilbert are walking together as Ming talks on her cell phone. "Yeah, I'm having the worst date ever. I'll check." Ming asks Dilbert, "What's that on the ground? It looks interesting?" Dilbert bends down tolook. Ming begins talking on her cell phone again. "Not so good."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dozen bugs, #bugs in software, #fix for 20k, #defective porduct, #evil euphria, #no choice, #making fortune, #single source tsrategy

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert tells a salesman: "We found a dozen bugs in the software you sold us." The salesman answers: "We can fix these bugs for $20,000. Dilbert is shocked: "What?" Dilber says: "You can't charge us to fix you own defective product!" The salesman laughs boisterously. He explains: "Sorry...I was overcome by an evil euphoria." Dilbert says: "I guess we have to pay. We have no choice!" Reaching for his cell-phone, the salesman says: "Excuse me." The salesman speaks into his cell-phone: "Put more bugs in the software! I'm making a fortune out here!" Dilbert thinks: "I'm starting to question our single source strategy."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #worthless awards, #famous people, #celebrities, #award ceremony, #become pretigious, #dogcart gullibility awards, #honor, #nominated

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert and Dilbert are on the couch, relaxing at home. Dogbert says: "I'm planning to give worthless awards to famous people." Dogbert continues: "If enough celebrities come to the award ceremony, it will become prestigious." Hair flying in the wind, a celebrity in his convertible speaks into his cell-phone: "I've never heard of the Dogbert Gullibility Award, but it's an honor to be nominated."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #drive carefully, #drive into a tree, #policy, #using cell phones, #poisonous snakes, #sarcasm, #joking, #obvious

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss and Asok the Intern are sitting at a table. The Boss informs Asok: "The new policy says you must drive carefully while using cell phones." Asok says: "This policy is just in time. I had planned to drive into a tree." Asok leans toward the Boss and asks: "Is there anything there about handling poisonous snakes?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #quick call, #continue, #presentation, #ignore, #vice presidentail, #pile of money, #capital spending, #small phone

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert stands in front of a conference room. A man's cell phone rings and he says, "Continue with your presentation while I take this quick call." Dilbert says, "Go ahead and ignore me, you vice presidential pile of stinkin' monkey.." The man says, "Okay, bye." Dilbert says, "Crapital spending." The man says, "Look how small my phone is."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #unicornitis, #cell normalizer, #dna sample, #genius garbageman

View Transcript

Transcript

The Garbage man throws garbage into his truck. The garbage man sees Dilbert who is wearing a coat and has a unicorn horn growing out of his forehead. The Grabage Man says, "Looks like someone has a bad case of unicornitis." The Grabage Man says, "I've got a pre-horn sample of your DNA in the truck. I could fix you up with my cell normalizer." Dilbert says, "Why do you have my DNA in your truck?" The Garbage man wears goggles and holds a ray gun. The Grabage Man says, "It's for exactly this sort of situation."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #under arrest, #stealing boxes, #recycling goals, #reuse, #recycle, #cell, #locked up, #cubicle

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert stands in the doorway of the copy room. Wally holds a cardboard box. Catbert says, "You're under arrest for stealing empty cardboard boxes!" Catbert says, "The company needs those boxes to meet its recycling goals." Wally says, "But reuse is better than recycling." Wally stands in his cubicle which now has a prison door. Catbert walks away. Wally stares through the bars. Wally thinks, "There's got to be a way out of this cell." The cubicle walls are barely higher than Wally's head.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bold commando, #relocates pc, #thwarting union rules, #moving computer, #police catch dilbert, #jailtime

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert wears a black hooded suit and carries a PC. He thinks, "The bold commando stealthily relocates his PC at night, thus thwarting burdensome union rules." A security guard pulls a gun on Dilbert and says, "Freeze, miscreant." Dilbert stands in a jail cell with two large men. He thinks, "I hope this works." One of the convicts says, "You don't look like Johnny Cash to me."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cell phone, #laptop, #allow work, #lug around, #worry, #broken, #stolen, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Dogbert sit at a table. Dilbert says, "My cellular phone and laptop computer allow me to work any time and anyplace . . ." Dogbert asks, "While driving?" Dilbert answers, "Too dangerous." Dogbert asks, "In restaurants?" Dilbert answers, "Too rude." Dogbert asks, "Outdoors?" Dilbert answers, "Nope." Dogbert concludes, "Basically, you lug them around and worry that they'll get stolen or broken." Dilbert fondles his laptop and says, "Stop it. You're scaring them."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dating scene, #reprodcue, #cell division, #steer clear

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I've given up on the whole dating scene. I've decided to reproduce by asexual cell division. Dilbert: I didn't realize that's an option. Wally: you never know until you try. Dilbert: I think I'll steer clear of here for a while. Wally: divide! divide!