Terrible News Comic Strips - Page 14
219 Results for Terrible News
View 131 - 140 results for terrible news comic strips. Discover the best "Terrible News" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share March 27, 2001's comic on:
Dogbert says to Ratbert, "Ratbert, I have good news and bad news." Dogbert says to a happy Ratbert, "The good news is I'm starting up a power utility company and you're my new VP of Operations!" Dogbert says to a chagrined Ratbert, "The bad news is that your office is inside a wheel attached to a generator."
Share February 17, 2001's comic on:
Dilbert sits at his computer as The Boss says, "Good news: The deadline got pushed back a week." Dilbert says to The Boss, "Good news?! I've been working for forty hours straight to finish on time!" The Boss thinks, "I just realized I don't know the difference between good news and bad news."
Share October 22, 2000's comic on:
The boss is walking and thinking, "Sometimes a manager must deliver bad news." The boss, behind Dilbert, thinks, "Luckily I enjoy it." The boss says, "Our sales force failed to meet their goals." The boss continues, "So I have to fire an engineer to reduce expenses." Dilbert says, "What?" Dilbert says, "You should fire the incompetent sales people!" Dilber continues, "It's immoral to punish innocent engineers for the sins of sales people! I will fight this all the way!" The boss says, "I'm firing Ted. Not you." Dilbert says, "Fair enough. Can you wait until I borrow his hole puncher?"
Share October 17, 2000's comic on:
The boss is sitting at his desk thinking, "Did Dilbert do something terrible or am I hallucinating?" The boss continues to think, "I'd better play it safe and punish him in ways that are ambiguous and untraceable." A woman stands behind Dilbert and says, "I had to change your network password to 'Die-Dilbert-Die' and I can't say why."
Share July 20, 2000's comic on:
The Boss sits at home watching the evening news on television. "Our investigtive reporter has identified the company behind the deadly falling satellites." The television sounds: "Whump!" The next day at the office, the Boss says to Dilbert "Your plan worked." Dilbert replies, "What plan?"
Share February 05, 2000's comic on:
Dilbert is at the threshold of an entrance bearing the sign: "Limbo, a division of Heck." Phil, the Ruler of Heck, tells Dilbert: "Step inside." Inside, standing by a "Please wait to be seated" sign, Phil informs Dilbert: "You'll be sitting in the Career Limbo section. Goodbye." Arms akimbo, Dilbert thinks to himself: "Jeepers! The service here is terrible!"
Share January 19, 1999's comic on:
Wally is being interviewed on tv. The female news anchor says, "Wally, tell our viewers how your internet start-up got so hot." Wally says, "Beats me. I was wondering how YOU got so hot. I'm burning up over here!" The interviewer says, "It says here you were an engineer." Wally says, "Is my ponytail doing anything for you?"
Share January 02, 1999's comic on:
The boss says, to Dilbert who reads a newspaper, "The company will no longer pay for the newspaper subscriptions." Dilbert says, "I pay for this myself. The news is highly relevant to my job." The boss says, "Is there anything I can do to make it less enjoyable?" Dilbert says, "Just keep jabbering."
Share June 08, 1998's comic on:
Caption: Catbert: Evil H.R. Director Catbert on The Boss' desk. The Boss sitting behind the desk. Catbert says, "Bad news: The employees are reading a newspaper." Catbert continues, "If they see the low unemployment rate, they'll know the balance of power has swung their way." Wally, Dilbert, and Alice sitting at table with newspapers on it. Alice holding a newspaper. Wally says, I plan to use the cat as a gargoyle on my cubicle roof." Dilbert responds, "If you run a current through him you can zap bugs."
Share May 27, 1998's comic on:
Dogbert sitting on a chair with a crown on his head while Garbage Man holds garbage bag. Dogbert asks, "Why are there no charismatic leaders anymore?" Garbage Man responds, "Cable TV." While placing garbage in dump truck, Garbage Man says, "Scandal is the most economical way to fill news programs. They'll go after you, too." Dogbert says, "I'll need a diversion." Dogbert and Dilbert on couch. Dilbert says, "I don't care if its a great news atory; I will NOT take fertility drugs!" Dogbert says, "They're in your coffee."