Upper Body Comic Strips - Page 14

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222 Results for Upper Body

View 131 - 140 results for upper body comic strips. Discover the best "Upper Body" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #severe shyness, #nude photos, #internet, #previous clients, #motley crue, #Dogbert, #technology

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Dilbert is in bed under blanket and says to Dogbert, "I've been having severe shyness attacks at work." Dogbert, who is sitting on Dilbert's legs says, "I can help." Dogbert says, "I'll send nude photos of you to everyone on the internet." Dilbert is in bed covering his upper body and asks Dogbert, "Will that work?" Dogbert, who is situated on Dilbert's leg replies, "All of my previous clients are dating 'Motley Crue' band members."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #new guy, #looks smarter, #look dumber, #ooga

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As Alice is working, a man comes up and says, "Alice, I'm the new guy. I look smarter than the people who already work here." Man's appearance starts to change. His body looks more prehistoric. He says, "As you get to know me, I'll look dumber and dumber." Man looks like a prehistoric man with a huge forehead now. Alice says, "That was fast." Man says, "Ooga."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #mordac, #preventer of information services, #guidlines for passwords, #six characters, #include numbers and letters, #upper and lower case, #change once a month, #touture employees, #write nothing down

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Man comes up to Dilbert and introduces himself, "I am Mordac, the preventer of information services. I bring new guidelines for passwords." Dilbert reads the guidelines, "'All passwords must be at least six characters long.. include numbers and letters.. include a mix of upper and lower case..'" Dilbert continues to read, "'Use different passwords for each system change once a month, do not write anything down.'" Mordac yells, "Squeal like a pig!!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #stack of paper, #cubicle cop, #body, #enrolled, #workshop, #temporary solution, #three days

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Dilbert Alice and Wally are eating lunch. Alice says, "I heard that a stack of your papers fell over and killed a cubicle cop." Alice says, "What did you do with the body?" Wally says, "I enrolled it in the quality workshop nextdoor." Dilbert says, "It's a temporary solution." Wally says, "The workshop is only three days."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #work ethic, #alice, #working during vacation, #remain motivated, #glass ceiling, #never break

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Asok the intern stands behind Alice, who is dressed casually and sits at her computer. Asok says, "I admire your work ethic, Alice. You're even working during your vacation." Alice grimaces and grits her teeth. Asok continues, "It must be hard to remian motivated when you know you can never break though the glass ceiling." Alice grimaces some more. Asok's body dangles from the ceiling through a mass of tiles and wiring. Alice looks up at him and says,"So, it looks like it's just tile after all."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ratbert, #pager, #vibrate, #yeehaaa, #no one paged, #vibrating body

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Dogbert straps a pager to Ratbert's back. "Ratbert, I want you to wear this pager at all times. I'll set it to vibrate." Ratbert screams and vibrates. Dogbert says, "No one has actually paged you yet." Ratbert lies on his back on the floor and says, "It gets better?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #employee rock climbing seminar, #valuable teamwork, #skills, #rock climbing, #open jars

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An instructor standing next to a rock climbing wall says, "Welcome to the employee rock climbing seminar." The instructor says, "You'll learn valuable teamwork skills by doing dangerous things unrelated to your job." Dilbert, Wally, and Alice look skeptical. Wally says, "Isn't rock climbing a solo activity?" Dilbert says, "I'll help identify your body." Wally says, "It seems like you need a strong grip to climb rocks." Wally says, 'I can't even open jars unless I use special tools." Wally grips his arm and screams, "Ow! Cramp!" Wally says, "I'm disoriented by the pain!" He falls into the others and knocks them down. Dilbert says, "Hey!" The instructor awards them their certificates and says, "Here are your diplomas. Now get out." Wally, Dilbert and Alice are in a heap on the floor. They all think in unison, "Go team!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #attractive, #body language, #employee satisfaction, #extent of feelings, #fake happiness, #impending reorganization, #Lottery, #marketing feild, #new rules, #not motivated, #paycheck, #sarcastic, #survey, #unprofessional, #work

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The caption says, "Asok the Intern explains the new rules of body language." Asok smiles and says, "Fake happiness." The caption says, "This means: I am not motivated by the size of my paycheck." Asok looks at his paycheck and sobs loudly. The caption says, "This means: I am slightly concerned about the impending reorganization." Asok shivers and looks frightened. The caption says, "This means: I have decided to work in the marketing field." Asok sticks out his tongue and turns his head in a "counter-clockwise spin." The caption says, "This means: I am being sarcastic." Asok says, "Oh, THERE'S a good plan." The caption says, "Note lips." The caption says, "This means: The recent employee satisfaction survey has not captured the extent of my feelings." Asok hangs in a noose. The caption says, "This means: I think you are attractive but it would be very unprofessional to show it." Asok looks at a woman and his eyes pop out of his head. The caption says, "This means: My lottery investment paid off." Asok gives the Boss a wedgie.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cloud of doom, #transfer, #new host body, #starts tim down, #Dogbert, #director special projects, #doom

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Dogbert stands on a stool and tells Dilbert, "The only way to get rid of your cloud of doom is to transfer it to a new host body." The cloud hovers over Dilbert's head. Dogbert says, "I will accomplish this with the help of your pointy-haired boss and a clueless co-worker named Tim." Dogbert straps Tim to a table and says, "We're secure. Begin transfer." The Boss looks at a document and says, "Tim, your new job will be director of special projects." The cloud moves toward Tim.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boredom, #conference room, #dead emplyee, #employee of the week, #headcount down

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The Boss carries a dead body over his shoulder. He tells Dilbert, "I found another dead employee in the conference room." Dilbert looks shocked. The Boss continues, "I don't know what got him - the boredom or the hard work. But headcount is down one and the company has life insurance on him!" The Boss thinks, "It looks like I found my 'Employee of the Week.'"