Empty Office Comic Strips - Page 14
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1000 Results for Empty Office
View 131 - 140 results for empty office comic strips. Discover the best "Empty Office" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday June 29,
2017
Asok Is In Charge Of Cubicle Move
Tags #office, #office workers, #cubicle, #popularity, #power
Transcript
Boss: Asok, I"m putting you in charge of deciding who gets which cubicle after the office redesign. Asok: But... everyone will hate me for deciding who gets the best cubicles. Boss: Try to see it as an upgrade to your current situation of no one caring about you. Asok: That helps a little.
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Friday June 30,
2017
Asok Uses An Algorithm
Tags #office workers, #cubicle, #popularity, #algorithm, #decision
Transcript
Asok: After the office redesign, you will be in the cubicle nearest our pointy-haired boss. Man: How did you decide on that? Asok: I used an algorithm. Man: Is the algorithm that you hate me? Asok: And you have never studied martial arts.
Saturday July 01,
2017
Move To Cubicles Is Complete
Tags #office workers, #office, #cubicle, #depression, #psychology
Transcript
Dilbert: We're done moving the staff from the open office plan back to cubicles. Now they will be less distracted when they focus on the crushing futility of their assignments. Boss: Good job. Dilbert: If you need me, I'll be in my fabric-covered box.
Wednesday January 17,
2018
Asok Upgrades His Soul
Tags #actions, #beliefs, #empty life, #hilarious, #legacy souls, #social media, #dopamine, #delivery systems, #technology
Transcript
Asok: I used to have a traditional soul, but I upgraded it. Now I let the major social media companies control my beliefs and actions through their dopamine delivery systems., Dilbert: That sounds like and empty life. Asok: you old- timers with your legacy souls are hilarious.
Wednesday March 21,
2018
Hot And Cold In The Office
Tags #temperature, #thermostat, #disagreement, #hot, #cold
Transcript
Alice: I accomplished nothing this week because the office is so cold my hands turned into blocks of ice. Dilbert: I accomplished nothing this week because the office is so hot I can't concentrate. Boss: Are the two of you the same species? Dilbert: That's a gray area because it would be impossible for us to mate.
Tuesday March 20,
2018
Temperature Court
Tags #thermostat, #temperature, #hot, #cold, #office, #office workers, #disagreement
Transcript
Dogbert: Welcome to temperature court. One of you has frozen appendages and one of you is burning up. But only one temperature can rule the office. I rule that the thermostat must be set at exactly 72 degrees. Dilbert: Noooo!!! Alice: Shoot me!
Saturday September 01,
2018
Glass Is Half Full
Tags #Dilbert, #Wally, #the boss, #glass, #half empty, #half full, #the engineer, #pie hole
Transcript
The Boss: A pessimist says the glass is half empty. An optimist says it is half full. Dilbert: The engineer says the glass is too big. The Boss: The manager says the engineer should shut his pie hole.
Tuesday November 06,
2018
Speakerphones
Tags #boss, #criticism, #distraction, #managers & supervisors, #office, #office workers, #phone call, #sarcasm
Transcript
Dilbert: I accomplished nothing this week because my idiot co-workers continue to use their speakerphones in the office. This is compounded by the fact that my idiot boss doesn't allow me to work from home. If you need me, I'll be sitting in my cubicle doing nothing but waiting for other people's phone calls to end.
Monday November 12,
2018
Dilbert Needs A New Chair
Tags #boss, #chair, #complaining, #criticism, #irritation, #managers & supervisors, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm
Transcript
Dilbert: I need a more ergonomic office chair. Boss: Let me check the budget. Hmm...nope. We don't have a budget for making whiny employees happy. Dilbert: My current chair hurts my back. Boss: It's no picnic for the chair either.
Saturday December 08,
2018
Horse Blinders
Tags #communication, #employees, #office, #office workers, #work
Transcript
Dilbert: I added horse blinders to my noise-cancellation headphones. You tried to ruin my productivity by moving to an open office plan, but I have thwarted your evil ambitions. Boss: Experts say the open plan is better for communication. Dilbert: Are you talking? I can't tell.