Stay At Job Comic Strips - Page 14

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View 131 - 140 results for stay at job comic strips. Discover the best "Stay At Job" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #longterm plan, #drift into job, #no impact, #finish wallowing

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Wally, Asok and Dilbert are having lunch. Wally says, "My long term plan is to drift into a job where I have no impact on anything." Asok looks faint, slouched back in his chair. A doctor holds a plunger and says, "He was too uninspired to finish swallowing."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #motivating you, #great job, #golfing day, #cow owkrers, #pay cut

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The Boss says to Dilbert and Wally, "I decided to try to motivate you." The Boss says, "...If you do a great job, you get to go on a golfing day with co-workers." Dilbert raises his hand and says, "Question: Can I take a pay cut instead." Wally thinks, "ZZZZ"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #pressure, #realize your job

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Wally says to The Boss, "Lately, I've been feeling a lot of pressure to do work." The Boss says, "Wally, do you realize this is your job?" Wally says, "There - that's exactly what I'm talking about."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #job secuirty, #be an engineer, #takes all day, #get in on scam

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Tina says to Alice, at Alice's cubicle, "Alice, I need a career that has job security." Tina says, "Teach me to be an engineer. I don't care if it takes all day." Tina says, "But don't tell anyone; they'll all try to get in on this scam." Alice makes a funny face.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #the turnaround ceo, #turnaround is complete, #new job, #meat packing, #reduce overhead, #switch rooms, #fisnih afternoon

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The Turnaround CEO The devilish CEO says to Dilbert, "The turnaround is complete. I'm off to my new job." He continues, "It's a meat packing house that need to reduce overhead." Still talking, "I figure I can switch a few room signs and finish in an afternoon."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #idiots, #i quit, #higher paying job, #miles away, #adios, #web designer, #hear your idiots, #ethernet

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Dilbert, the boss and a male employee are sitting at a table. The employee who has a lap-top in front of him says: "You're all idiots. I quit!" The male employee is typing on his lap-top and says: "There ... I found a higher paying job two miles away. Adios, suckers." A female employee standing between Dilbert and the boss says: "I'm the new web designer. I hear you're idiots. Where's the ethernet jack?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #deny request, #evil incarnate, #something specific, #dollar estimate, #value, #chair, #quantify job, #work tools

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Dilbert approaches a worker sitting at his desk. He is holding a piece of paper and says, "Why did the I.S. department deny my request for a P.C. upgrade?" The worker holds up his arms and shouts, "Because we are evil incarnate! BUWAHAHAHA!!" Dilbert says, "I was looking for something more specific." The worker holds out the paper and says, "You didn't provide a dollar estimate of the benefits." Dilbert says, "That's ridiculous. I can't put a value on every tool I need to do my job." The worker sits back in his chair with his arms folded and says, "If you can't quantify it, then it must not be necessary." Dilbert throws up his hands and says, "Then why does the company give me a chair? I can't quantify that either." Dilbert sits on the floor of his cubicle, without a chair. He thinks, "Here's one more reason why it stinks to be me."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #more money else where, #good coffee, #why stay

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Dilbert says to Dogbert over a cup of coffee: "I know I could earn more money at another company. So why do I stay?" Dogbert says: "Maybe the coffee is good and you enjoy watching the antics of feeble, unaware loosers." Dilbert begins to say: "No, I don't think that's..." But Dogbert, finishing his cup of coffee, cuts him off with: "This coffee is good."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #where he hid files, #disgruntled, #porcelain patty, #job resigned

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Asok the Intern is at the Boss's office. The Boss is sitting behind his desk. He tells Asok: "Ted resigned. Your job is to find out where he hid his files." He continues: "Our only clue is that he was disgruntled." Asok is in the bathroom. He jots down in his notepad: "Negatory on porcelain patty."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #quit job, #next year, #extra week vacation, #every ten years

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Alice says to Dilbert as they walk, "I'd quit this job, but next year I'll get an extra week of vacation." Dilbert replies, "If you get an extra week for every ten years of services..." Dilbert continues, "...you'll be happy in 480 years. Good plan." Alice replies, not humored "Shut up."