Wear Whatever Comic Strips - Page 14

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242 Results for Wear Whatever

View 131 - 140 results for wear whatever comic strips. Discover the best "Wear Whatever" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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"I need you to drop whatever you're doing and work all night to make this change to your system." "If you refuse to do my bidding, here's the rumor I will spread about you." "Ha! I'll say I was only scratching an itch." "Good luck with that."

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"Today you will wear clothes you don't want to wear." "You'll drive somewhere you don't want to be, and do things you don't want to do." "Have a nice day."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #stirrup pants, #not professional, #filed patent, #50 million dollars, #earn license fees, #comapny, #various pant crises

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The Boss calls Alice as she is walking by: "Alice!" The Boss tells Alice: "Stirrup pants are not professional attire." Alice explains: "I just filed a patent that will earn fifty million in license fees for the company." The Boss is impressed: "Really? Wow." He continues: "But its no excuse for bad pants." Alice says: "Whatever. Did you sign the budget request I gave you last week?" The Boss answers: "No... I've been busy with various pant-related crises." The stirrup pants are pulled over the Boss's head. He thinks: "Here's another."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cruelty, #office workers, #unpaid intern, #resort fee, #work experience, #zips eyeholes, #leather hood

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Tina: Are you the new upaid intern? Coworker: No, but that's what I aspire to be. I'm merely an intern to another intern. And I pay a resort fee just to use the restroom. Tina: At least you get valuable work experience. Coworker: Until he zips the eyeholes on the leather hood I wear in meetings.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #despair, #prices, #social media expert, #fee, #pay scale, #popcorn, #meeting, #hope left body, #business

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Dilbert: I assume we pay you based on how much you increase our social media hits. Consultant: No. My fee is whatever I think you're dumb enough to pay for ambiguous outcomes. Dilbert: Either hope just left my body or the popcorn is getting chatty. Social media expert

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #interviews, #trousers, #emperor has no clothes, #wearing pants, #forget pants

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Boss: I'm looking for employees who aren't afraid to tell the emperor he has no clothes. Interviewee: Fine. You're not wearing pants. Boss: What? The one time I forget to wear pants...

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #3d printer, #answer questions, #modeling (sculpture), #pointy haired boss

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Carol: Your pointy-haired boss wants to know if you tested the new 3-D printer yet. Why aren't you answering my question? Whatever. Wally: Success.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #annoyance, #screen savers, #company logo, #corporate rule, #agenda, #meeting, #business

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Boss: First on the agenda, we're standardizing all screen savers to be our company logo. Second, our CEO is having a contest to see who can suggest the most useless corporate rule to eliminate. Wally: I nominate the nee screen-saver rule. Boss: You can't nominate that one. It's too new. Dilbert: Why does that matter? Isn't it better to kill it before it gets implemented? Boss: It's too soon! It's just too soon! Dilbert: Fine. Boss: Fine. Wally: I nominate whatever is next on the agenda.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #annoyance, #correspondence, #unclear email, #unwillingness, #answer questions

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Boss: This isn't what I wanted. Dilbert: I know. But given your unclear email and your unwillingness to answer follow-up questions, I decided to do whatever entertained me. Boss: Do we have a problem here? Dilbert: No, this totally works for me.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ignorance (knowledge), #managers & supervisors, #values, #don't run with scissors, #ask for raises, #employee values, #business

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CEO: Experts say we need to empower employees with "values." So I guess we need some values, whatever the heck those are. Boss: I think it's like "Don't run with scissors." CEO: Let's start with that and see if they stop asking for raises.