Advice Comic Strips - Page 15
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198 Results for Advice
View 141 - 150 results for Advice comic strips. Discover the best "Advice" comics from Dilbert.com.
Friday September 26,
2014
Tags anxiety, bad advice, projects, work load, freaking out, tackle, unpleasant tasks first, wrong order
Transcript
Dilbert: I have too many projects. I'm freaking out. Boss: Experts say you should tackle the most unpleasant tasks first, so you have a feeling of accomplishment and control. Dilbert: Now I have too many projects and some extra anxiety that I'm doing them in the wrong order. Boss: Off you go.
Top Dilbert Searches
marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Saturday November 22,
2014
Boss Transfers Problem To Someone Else
Tags Advice, bad advice, problem, problems, snag, prodcuts, accept failure, lie, transfer problem, father, old sayings, Family
Transcript
Dilbert:I'm hitting a snag with this RFP because our products don't do what they need. Should I give up and accept failure or lie about our features and transfer the problem to them? Boss: My daddy used to say it isn't a problem if you can give it to someone else. Dilbert: Then he drove you to school?
Tuesday December 23,
2014
Carol Has Passion For Her Job
Tags Advice, boredom, boring, email, fake passion, forwarded email, mindless, passion, success, warren buffet, work ethic
Transcript
Carol: Warren Buffett says my career will be better if I show passion for my job. I'll have to fake the passion because everything I do in this job is mindless and boring. Later. Carol: Woo-hoo! I forwarded an email!
Tuesday January 13,
2015
The Illusion Of Leadership
Tags absent mindedness, Advice, forget, forgetfulness, jargon, leadership, managers, managers & supervisors, business
Transcript
Boss: I forget why I walked over here. Dilbert: Were you planning to spew empty jargon in my direction to create the illusion of leadership? Boss: Oh, right. But now it feels as if the moment has passed.
Saturday February 14,
2015
Fifty Tips For Success
Tags Advice, career advice, obliviousness, secret, success, tech millionaire
Transcript
Asok: A 27-year-old tech millionaire published his list of fifty things you need to do to succeed. Dilbert: In other words, he has no idea why he succeeded. Asok: Sure he does. He even has a chart of his top thirty... priorities. Okay, I hear it now.
Saturday February 21,
2015
Boss Has Investment Tips For Asok
Tags Advice, bad advice, diversification, investment, obliviousness, stock market, money
Transcript
Asok: Do you have any investment tips? Boss: You're asking the right person! I can teach you how to time the market, catch a falling knife, and invest in a dead-cat bounce. That's my system. Asok: What about diversification? Boss: I don't invest in anything I can't spell.
Monday February 23,
2015
Technical Analysis
Tags Advice, bad advice, investing, stock market, stocks, squirrel sitting, clown shoulder, technical analysis, money
Transcript
Lessons in Investing. Boss: You should buy a stock whenever the chart looks like a squirrel sitting on a clown's shoulder. That's called "technical analysis." Asok: I'm not going to do that. Boss: Good. Because it doesn't work if everyone does it.
Tuesday February 24,
2015
Everyone Can Beat The Market Average
Tags Advice, bad advice, investing, investor, stock market, stock reserch, money
Transcript
Boss: Asok, you can beat market averages by doing your own stock research. Asok: So... you believe every investor can beat the average by reading the same information? Boss: Yes. Asok: Makes you wonder why more people don't do it. Boss: Just lazy, I guess.
Thursday March 12,
2015
Learning To Avoid Responsibility
Tags mentoring, mentor, mentors, protege, criticism, responsibility, Advice
Transcript
CEO: No matter how much I mentor you, you still act the same. Wally: That's because you're a terrible mentor. You owe me an apology for wasting my time. CEO: I don't think the problem is on my end. Wally: Are you teaching me how to avoid taking responsibility?
Monday March 16,
2015
Ceo Mentors Wally To No Avail
Tags Promotion, saving face, executives, bad advice, bad ideas, mentor, mentoring
Transcript
CEO: I've been mentoring Wally for over a week and he's still useless. But we need to promote him to Vice President so it looks as if my mentoring works. Catbert: That might be a bad idea in the long run. CEO: What is this "long run" people keep harping about?


