Deception Comic Strips - Page 15
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157 Results for Deception
View 141 - 150 results for deception comic strips. Discover the best "Deception" comics from Dilbert.com.
Friday September 29,
2017
Everything Sounds Like A Lie
Tags lying, deception, catch-22, accusation, innocence, guilt
Transcript
Tina: Now that everyone knows you are a liar, everything you say sounds like a lie. Dilbert: You starting assumption is wrong. I didn't lie about anything. Tina: That's exactly what liars say. Dilbert: Excuse me while I bang my head on this table until I pass out.
Saturday October 07,
2017
Fix It With Marketing
Tuesday October 03,
2017
Dogbert The Pr Specialist
Tags public relations, image, likeability, pr, deception
Transcript
Narrator: Dogbert the public relations specialist. Dogbert: The public hates you for all the right reasons. I'll repair your public image by photographing you serving meals in a homeless shelter. CEO: Is the public really that dumb? Dogbert: Yup. I'll have you out of there in two scoops and a click.
Sunday November 05,
2017
Tags lying, deception, secret, choosing, choices
Transcript
Man: Don't tell Dilbert I told you what he plans to do. Alice: What if he asks me how I found out? Man: You should lie. Alice: You have given me two bad choices. If I don't change my plans based on this new information, I'll have big problems. But if I act on it, Dilbert will ask me how I knew, and that will turn me into a liar. Man: Yes, those are your only options. Alice: Unless... Man: There's no "unless." You have only two options. Just two! Alice: Have you ever seen the view from the roof?
Thursday October 12,
2017
Dilbert Is Bad At Negotiating
Tags negotiating, haggle, trick, deception
Transcript
Dilbert: I want you to lower your price, but I don't know how to negotiate. Man: It's easy. All you need to do is offer to pay more than the list price and wait for me to counteroffer. Dilbert: Okay... I'll pay twenty percent over the list price. Man: You win! Sign here.
Saturday October 14,
2017
Dogbert's Negotiating Class
Tags negotiating, deception, sales, manipulation, deal, business
Transcript
Boss: I approved your request to take a negotiating class. Dilbert: Why did you change your mind? Boss: The instructor offered a great deal. Narrator: Earlier that day. Dogbert: Would you like to spend other people's money to get rid of Dilbert for a few days? Boss: Sold!
Friday November 10,
2017
Wally Is Working If You Don't See Him
Tags laziness, deception, invisibility, work ethic
Transcript
Boss: How's your stealth clothing project coming along? Wally: Great. I'm usually testing the prototype in the office. That's why you rarely see me working. Boss: So... the less I see you work, the more successful you must be? Wally: It's just common sense.
Thursday November 09,
2017
Wally Works On Stealth Clothing
Tags invisibility, attendance, deception, laziness
Transcript
Boss: We won a bid to design stealth clothing for the military. Wally: Ooh! Ooh! I volunteer to work on that project. Boss: Um... okay. Narrator: One month later. Boss: Your attendance has been poor lately. Wally: Here's where I teach you about "reasonable doubt."
Monday February 05,
2018
Sunk Costs
Tags money, big business, logic, loss, deception
Transcript
Dilbert: The economics of the project have changed. We need to shut it down. Boss: If we stop now, the $10 million we already spent will be wasted. Dilbert: And if we stop later? Boss: The trick is to never finish the project.
Wednesday February 07,
2018
Wally Finds Critical Bug
Tags big business, bug, deception, insider trading, stock, trick
Transcript
Wally: I found a critical bug in our software that could make our product worthless in a week. If you give me a huge raise, I won't tell anyone about the problem until you sell all of your company stock. Boss: Deal! Narrator: Two weeks later. Boss: Why haven't I heard about the bug yet? Wally: You didn't ask me if I knew how to fix it.

