Understand Complex Comic Strips - Page 15

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

256 Results for Understand Complex

View 141 - 150 results for understand complex comic strips. Discover the best "Understand Complex" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #evil director, #contrators, #company air, #employees only, #own air supply, #using light

View Transcript

Transcript

Headline: Catbert: Evil HR Director. Catbert leans over a Carl's cubicle wall. Catbert says, "Contractors are not allowed to breath company air, Carl." Catbert continues, "This air is for employees only. You need to supply your own air." Carl, Dilbert, and Wally are sitting at a conference table. Carl is wearing an oxygen tank and mumbles, "Mmb, Bmf, Rmn, Hmr!" Dilbert turns to Wally and asks, "Does anyone understand Carl?" Wally replies, "Hey! He's using our light!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #not answered email, #poorly written, #didn't undertsnd, #dare to start dialogue, #talk with boss, #email boss

View Transcript

Transcript

A coworker asks Dilbert, "Dude, why haven't you answered my e-mail?" Dilbert responds, "Your message was so poorly written that I didn't understand it and I didn't dare to start a dialogue." The coworker crosses his arms and says, "Maybe I should have a talk with your boss." Dilbert responds, "Maybe you should e-mail him."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #need approval, #equipment, #installed

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to The Boss, "I need your approval for this expense. The equipment is already here and installed." Dilbert continues, "I left out the description because you wouldn't understand it anyway." The Boss says to Catbert, "There's a fine line between managing and being totally useless." Catbert responds, "Luckily it looks the same."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #points at screen, #oily finger, #clean screen, #hover finger, #losing aura of infalliability

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss points to the screen and tells Tina the Tech Writer while she is behind her computer: "Tina, move that title..." He continues: "...over here." Tina screams: "Aaaagh!!" She exclaims: "Your finger oil is on my screen!!!" She says: "Now I have to spend ten minutes cleaning it..." She continues: "...because you don't understand how to hover your finger." She demonstrates for the Boss: "See?! This isn't hard. You hover the finger! Don't touch!" The Boss thinks as he is walking away: "I hope I'm not losing my aura of infallibility."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #online self assessment, #survey, #program, #question blank, #says you steal, #bad advice

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to Catbert, "I can't complete the online self-assessment survey. It asks where I need improvement and I don't need any." Dilbert continues, "The program won't let me leave that question blank." Catbert responds, "Just check the box that says you steal." Dilbert responds, "And people will understand that I don't mean it?" Catbert grins and says, "Sure."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #greek, #greek word, #parthenon, #word for sports event, #zeus, #new product

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss addresses a meeting, "Wally has been researching Greek words to name our new product." Wally says, "All I have is Zeus. And Parthenon. And the word 'Greek' itself." Wally continues, "I understand they have a word for sports even too. I'm trying to track that down."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business card orders, #downsized, #3 per week, #possibility of leaving, #rates, #fees, #calculations

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert approaches Carol and asks, "How many business cards should I order?" Carol responds, "It depends." Carol continues, "I use a complex formula based on your burn rate and your likelihood of getting downsized." Dilbert says, "I use about three per week." Carol replies, "You'll need three cards."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #alice, #giant magnifying glass, #death ray, #too warm, #head too warm

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert says to Alice, "Alice, I understand you've been using a giant magnifying glass as a death ray in the office." Alice responds, "It's not a death ray, I use it only to burn off toupees." Catbert replies, "Oh.. that's okay." A co-worker asks Dilbert, "Is your head too warm? My toupee is too warm."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #criticize things, #dont understnd, #kyoto treaty, #flat tax, #unfair, #stem cells

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: I've decided to spend more time criticizing things I don't understand. I say we should flat-tax the kyoto treaty all the way back to the security council, Dilbert: wouldn't that be unfair to stem cells? Dogbert: Bah!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #project manager, #direct natural talent, #energy, #common goal, #agenda, #copies of agenda, #health

View Transcript

Transcript

wally: "I've never been a project manager before." "I understand I'm supposed to direct your natural talents and energies toward a common goal." Wally: "Carol, did you make copies of the agenda?" Carol: "No, it sounded hard."