Experimental Medical Procedures Comic Strips - Page 15

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

159 Results for Experimental Medical Procedures

View 141 - 150 results for experimental medical procedures comic strips. Discover the best "Experimental Medical Procedures" comics from Dilbert.com.

Picking The Spaceship Staff

Thank you for voting.
Picking The Spaceship Staff - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 28, 2016's comic on:


Tags #space, #space flight, #rocket, #death, #sacrifice, #astronaut, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: How's the Mars spaceship project going? Boss: Good. I picked our worst employees to be on the first test flight, just in case it explodes. CEO: Good thinking. Boss: We have two ways to win and no way to lose.

Spreading Ted's Ashes

Thank you for voting.
Spreading Ted's Ashes - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 31, 2016's comic on:


Tags #apathy, #ashes, #cremation, #death, #spreading, #toilet, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: Ted's widow asked us to spread his ashes around the office because he loved his job. Wally: I'll do it. Alice: You didn't like Ted. Wally: Was that a requirement? Alice: Don't let anyone see you flush it.

Robotic Hair Transplant

Thank you for voting.
Robotic Hair Transplant - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 30, 2017's comic on:


Tags #coffee, #conversation, #hair, #surgery, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

Never go to a robotic hair transplant center on the same day they upgrade the software. Is that the surgery where they take hair from the back of your head and fill in the bald spot? That's how the old software worked. The new one didn't respect boundaries.

3 D Printer Will Save Millions

Thank you for voting.
3 D Printer Will Save Millions - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 14, 2017's comic on:


Tags #altruism, #money, #profit, #big business, #priorities, #morals, #life

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I invented a 3-D printer for the poor that can create any kind of generic drug or medical device. It will save millions. Boss: ...of dollars? Dilbert: People. Boss: Pass.

Sparing A Robot's Feelings

Thank you for voting.
Sparing A Robot's Feelings - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 11, 2017's comic on:


Tags #technology, #sentience, #feelings, #emotions, #afterlife, #death, #atheism, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

Robot: What kind of afterlife are we looking at here? Dilbert: Your meaningless existence will be punctuated by an eternity of darkness. Robot: Thanks for sparing my feelings! Dilbert: Sorry. I usually delete those first.

Dogbert Gives Wally A Prescription

Thank you for voting.
Dogbert Gives Wally A Prescription - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 29, 2017's comic on:


Tags #medicine, #excuse, #doctor, #laziness, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I keep falling asleep during meetings. Dogbert: Your problem is that you're useless. I'll give you a doctor's note that says you can sleep during meetings. Wally: You're the best doctor ever. Dogbert: Tell that to the tip jar in the lobby.

Gain Weight Using Product

Thank you for voting.
Gain Weight Using Product - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 23, 2017's comic on:


Tags #warning, #caution, #labeleing, #weight, #safety, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: Did I leave out any risks on the product warning page? Boss: I don't see anything about the risk of overeating while owning the product. Tina: Our product has nothing to do with eating. Boss: Then why did I gain weight when I used it?

Reanimated Employee

Thank you for voting.
Reanimated Employee - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 16, 2017's comic on:


Tags #soul, #death, #near death experience, #heaven, #hell, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: How did you end up with no soul? Randy: I died during surgery and my soul went to the afterlife before doctors reanimated my body. Dilbert: I thought the soul returns when that happens. Randy: You're thinking of heaven.

Ted Might Drop Dead

Thank you for voting.
Ted Might Drop Dead - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 17, 2017's comic on:


Tags #health, #monitor, #fitbit, #wearable tech, #heart attack, #diseases, #death, #prediction, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Ted, your performance is poor. I need to let you go. Ted: Is it a coincidence that you're firing me at the same time my employee health monitor detected cardiovascular disease? How good are the predictive analytics on this? Boss: Don't make lunch plans.

Wally Not Motivated

Thank you for voting.
Wally Not Motivated - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 22, 2017's comic on:


Tags #laziness, #motivation, #behavior, #medical, #treatment, #blame, #accountability, #psychology

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I need to take a medical leave to recover from my crippling laziness. Boss: Laziness is a behavior problem, not a medical problem. Wally: That would suggest you have not motivated me enough. Boss: Can't be that. It sounds more like you're dying.