Paid Less Comic Strips - Page 15

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374 Results for Paid Less

View 141 - 150 results for paid less comic strips. Discover the best "Paid Less" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 21, 2003's comic on:


Tags #power to become invisible, #sit home, #get paid, #Wally, #boss, #hiding

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Wally and Asok are eating lunch. Wally says, "Long term, I hope to convince our boss that I have the power to become invisible." Wally continues, "Then I can just sit home and get paid. Oh, it will be sweet." The Boss is sitting at his desk, he looks scared. He asks, "Wally? Is that you?" Wally is hiding behind The Boss' chair. Wally replies, "Right in front of you."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 23, 2003's comic on:


Tags #plant watering service, #less expensive one, #plastic plants

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The Boss says to Wally and Dilbert, "I fired our plant-watering service and hired a less expensive one." The Boss continues, "That's the sort of leadership that will turn this company around." Wally asks, "Were we doing well?" Dilbert says, "Our plants are plastic."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 29, 2003's comic on:


Tags #late worker, #coffee and bagel, #starts late, #woman, #worked 6am, #paid same, #smarter, #casual brillaince

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Wally is walking past Alice's cubicle. Alice calls out, "You're coming to work at nine-thirty?" Alice walks over to Wally and says, "By the time you get your coffee and get your bagel, it'll be ten o'clock!" Alice continues, "I started at six! I've already worked for four hours, and I'll probably stay late!" Alice continues, "Over the course of a lifetime, I'll work twice as much as you!" Alice realizes, "But... we'll be paid the same... and we'll both die anyway." Alice continues, "So.. I guess what you're saying is that you're smarter than I am." Alice yells, "I curse the casual brilliance of your life strategy!!!" Wally walks away and thinks, "My bagel will be extra tasty today."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 23, 2003's comic on:


Tags #being male, #excellence award, #bend metal, #steel spike, #highest paid, #department

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Dilbert: I need to find a way to bend this steel rod into a 'U.' Wally: I'll take care of it. I won the prestigious "steel spike award" For engineering excellence. Alice: what??!! Wally: I guess its validation for being the highest paid in the department....and for being male.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 02, 2003's comic on:


Tags #pointy haired, #takeover, #should report, #secret got out, #extra money

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"Our goal is nothing less than a complete takeover of pointy-haired Carl's software division." "We'll start secretly doing their jobs in addition to our own. Then I'll argue that they should report to me." "Hypothetically, if the secret got out, would we stop working twice as hard for no extra money?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 17, 2003's comic on:


Tags #netwrok security, #buggy, #complicated, #user guide, #pure evil, #tech support dept, #chimp with typewriter, #strategy, #victims, #hair quiver, #consultants, #paid by hour

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Dogbert Consults. DOgbert: "Your network-security product is buggy and complicated." "Your used guide is an inspired work of pure evil." "And your tech-support department is an inebriated chimpanzee with a typewriter." "One strategy would be to fix all of those problems." The Boss: "What's the other strategy?" Dogbert: "Sell consulting services to your victims... I mean customers!" The Boss: "I'm so happy, it's making my hair quiver!" "But what do we do when our consultants can't make our products work either?" Dogbert: "They're paid by the hour." The Boss: "QUIVER!!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 22, 2003's comic on:


Tags #more with less, #motivation, #communication, #more specific

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The Boss: Our goal is to do more with less. Wally: Less motivation? The Boss: I can't be more specific. wally: Less communication?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 02, 2004's comic on:


Tags #office relocation, #cubicle, #air duct, #facilities, #chip out penguin, #cold, #cooler

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"Office relocation." "Some cubicles are slightly less desirable than others." "For example, your new cubicle is below an air duct so it is sometimes cooler than the area around it." "I asked the facilities people to chip out the penguin as soon as possible."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 03, 2004's comic on:


Tags #office relocation., #new cubicle, #less roomy, #need butter, #torso, #slide in, #attracts rats, #cheap, #low budget

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Office relocation. Asok: Your new cubicle is less roomy than the old one. You will need this butter. Apply it liberally to your torso area and you can slide right in. But don't stay in there for more than 10 minutes at a time because it attracts rats.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 16, 2004's comic on:


Tags #consultant, #create, #disruptive innovations, #dogbert consults, #redefine market, #business

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DOGBERT CONSULTS Dogbert: "To survive, you must create disruptive innovations that redefine the market." wally: "Does that mean the same thing as 'sell things people want'?" Dogbert: "There's one big difference." wally: "You only get paid if you say it in a funny way?" dogcart: "I like to think disruptively innovative."