Tech Worter Comic Strips - Page 15

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

160 Results for Tech Worter

View 141 - 150 results for tech worter comic strips. Discover the best "Tech Worter" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #technology, #cognition, #distraction, #Entertainment, #mindless, #cell phone, #internet, #social media

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I wanted to be productive this week but the big tech companies didn't let me. Boss: That's ridiculous. They can't stop people from doing work. Dilbert: Actually, they can. Their business models depend on interrupting users with ads, and apps, and mindless entertainment. Until recently, humans could resist these distractions. But now the tech companies are using science to make their apps addictive. They learned how to hijack our brains. What started as simple entertainment evolved into military-grade mind control. Did you hear any of that? Boss: Any of what?

Watch That Monitors Health

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Watch That Monitors Health - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #health, #wearable tech, #fitbit, #fitness, #monitor, #surveillance

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Our new product is a watch that monitors every aspect of your health. Wearing the watch is mandatory for all employees. Your data will automatically stream to our cloud storage. Voice: Because you care about our health? Boss: Sure. We'll go with that.

Wally's Watch Is A Snitch

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally's Watch Is A Snitch - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #wearable tech, #health, #surveillance, #fitbit, #monitor, #fitness, #attendance

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I can't come to work today. I'm totally sick. Boss: According to your employee health monitor, you're not sick at all. Wally: Stupid snitch!!!

Work Until You Drop

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Work Until You Drop - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #health, #monitor, #fitbit, #energy, #surveillance, #wearable tech, #dedication, #work ethic

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Your health tracker says you are leaving work at the end of each day with energy to spare. That's exactly like stealing from the company. Dilbert: You want me to work until I drop? Boss: I'm not allowed to say that directly.

Ted Might Drop Dead

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ted Might Drop Dead - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #health, #monitor, #fitbit, #wearable tech, #heart attack, #diseases, #death, #prediction, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Ted, your performance is poor. I need to let you go. Ted: Is it a coincidence that you're firing me at the same time my employee health monitor detected cardiovascular disease? How good are the predictive analytics on this? Boss: Don't make lunch plans.

Let's Do The Meeting Later

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Let's Do The Meeting Later - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #fitbit, #health, #monitor, #wearable tech, #surveillance

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: According to your employee health monitor, your lack of sleep last night is hampering your mental functions. Let's end the meeting and try again when your brain is working better. Man: I don't understand. Dilbert: That is consistent with the data.

Criminal Does Tech Support

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Criminal Does Tech Support - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #the boss, #Dilbert, #market, #competitive, #career, #criminal, #internal, #tech support, #passwords, #software, #justice, #fist

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I know the job market is highly competitive, but was it really a good idea to hire a career criminal? The Boss: Relax. He's just doing internal tech support. Paul: I'll need all of your passwords to update your software. Alice: Have you met my fist of justice?

New Statue In The Lobby

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
New Statue In The Lobby - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #alice, #the boss, #criminal, #tech support, #darned, #good, #report

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Where's the career criminal I hired to do tech support? He was last seen talking to you. Alice: Rumor has it that someone murdered him, covered him in with-out and tried to pass him off as a statue in the lobby. Dilbert: I would report this if it did't look so darned good here.

Tina Enters Coma

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Tina Enters Coma - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office workers, #business, #technology, #write, #body, #language, #read

View Transcript

Transcript

tina the tech writer tina: in simple terms, tell me how the technology works, so i can write about it. one hour later dilbert pointing to flow chart: and that's how it all...uh-oh. if i am reading your body language correctly, you're saying i could have shortened that. continued...

Adding Insult To Injury

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Adding Insult To Injury  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #tech support, #customer, #calls, #interface, #reboot, #idiot

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: i hired the dogbert tech support team to help with customer calls because our user interface is so sadistic. dilbert: wouldn't that be adding insult to injury? boss: how so? dogbert in a office at a desk yelling: try rebooting, you idiot. and don't call again!