2020 Comic Strips - Page 15
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Character
Wednesday May 20,
2020
High Fives
Tags boss, hygiene, life, office workers, virus, pandemic, social distancing
Transcript
Boss: To avoid spreading viruses, there will be no shaking hands in the workplace. That custom has been replaced by uncomfortable body language and awkward banter about not shaking hands. Dilbert: Are high-fives still okay? Boss: Yes, we don't care if those people live or die.
Top Dilbert Searches
marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Thursday May 21,
2020
Mumble Ventriloquists
Friday May 22,
2020
Virus Hellscape
Tags boss, diseases, office workers, virus, pandemic
Transcript
Boss: Do you have ten munutes to come talk to me about the project timeline. Dilbert: Yes, but it isn't worth exposing myself to you virus-droplet hellscape. Boss: I'll just guess what you would have said. Dilbert: I think that's best.
Saturday May 23,
2020
Smartphones Spread Viruses
Tags cell phone, hygiene, science, contagion, pandemic, smartphone, germs
Transcript
Boss: Scientists say our smartphones can spread the coronavirus. That's why I no longer answer the phone. You never know if the caller is infected. Asok: I don't think... Dilbert: Let it go.
Sunday May 24,
2020
Stopping Theft Everywhere
Tags office workers, business, technology, system, reduce, theft, dumb, product
Transcript
dilbert: and by using this system, we will drastically reduce theft. co-worker: that's the dumbest think i have ever heard. no one can stop theft everywhere in the world. dilbert: i said we would reduce it, not eliminate it. and only for our own products. co-worker: so, in other words, it won't work. dilbert: it works to reduce theft. co-worker: but you admit there will be theft. dilbert standing and yelling: what is wrong with you???? co-worker: hey, i'm not the one who is in favor of theft.
Monday May 25,
2020
Ceo Says Coronavirus Is Hoax
Tuesday May 26,
2020
Begging The Universe For Trouble
Wednesday May 27,
2020
Boss Is In A High Risk Group
Tags criticism, health & safety, office workers, sarcasm, virus, pandemic, risk
Transcript
Carol: Are you worried about coronavirus because you're in a high-risk group? Boss: Why would I be in a high-risk group? Carol: Do you own a full-length mirror? Boss: No. They make me look fat.
Thursday May 28,
2020
Wally Borrows Money
Tags danger, health & safety, money, office workers, social distancing
Transcript
Wally: I heard you are not practicing social distancing. Can I borrow some money? CEO: What does social distancing have to do with borrowing money? Wally: I like borrowing money when I might not have to pay it back.
Friday May 29,
2020
Ceo Does Math
Tags death & dying, diseases, earth, humans, sarcasm, pandemic, virus
Transcript
CEO: Why is everyone so panicked about coronavirus when maybe only 1% who get it will die? Catbert: One percent of the population of Earth would be...77 million dead. CEO: Yes, but the whole world won't get it. Catbert: They will if they listen to you.

