Layoff List Comic Strips - Page 15

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View 141 - 150 results for layoff list comic strips. Discover the best "Layoff List" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #tina brittlke tech, #dysfunctional, #opinions, #email, #women portrayed, #lawyers, #startship captains, #art class

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Dogbert and Tina are sitting at a table. Dogbert says to the reader, "This week, we introduced Tina the Brittle Tech Writer to the strip. Tina is dysfunctional like everybody here except me." Tina growls, "RRRR." Dogbert continues, "Send your opinions by e-mail to scottadams@aol.com. It's the only way we can learn." Tina growls, "RRRR." A written list says, "PICK ONE: A. Women should only be portrayed as lawyers and starship captains. B. I don't have e-mail. C. Tina should be treated with the same dignity as Dilbert and Wally. D. Take an art class."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ratbert, #temp worker, #really testing self worth, #compensate list of talents, #walks past, #ignore i eat rubber, #i carry disease, #i enjoy opera

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Ratbert is in his box. He thinks, "This is really testing my sense of self-worth." Ratbert continues thinking, "I will compensate by shouting a list of my talents to anybody who walks past." Dilbert is standing next to Wally. Dilbert says, "Ignore him. He's trying to trick us into making eye contact." Out of view, Ratbert shouts, "I eat rubber! I carry disease! I enjoy opera!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bob in procurement, #approved equipment list, #approved list, #more work, #alleged test, #philosophy, #bob the dinosaur

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Wally is in Bob the Dinosaur's office. Bob says, "I'm afraid the equipment you want is not on the approved equipment list." Bob continues, "Let me think . . . if I add this to the approved list, that's more work for ME . . . but if I say no, it's more work for YOU . . . hmm . . . think, think . . ." Wally says, "I'd like to see this alleged list." Bob replies, "Well, it's not so much a physical list as it is a philosophy."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boss's ignorance, #advantage, #impresses him, #accomplishments, #barney suit, #secret identity

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Dogbert says to Dilbert, "You must learn to use your boss's ignorance to your advantage." Dogbert continues, "Find out what impresses him and list it on your accomplishments." Dilbert sits across from the Boss's desk. The Boss reads a document and says, "You're the actor in the 'Barney' suit?!! I love that guy!" Dilbert says, "Don't tell anybody my secret identity."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #assignments by priority, #won't waste time, #unimportant stuff, #a priority, #personal life, #must do, #b priorities

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The Boss stands in front of Dilbert who is seated at his desk. The Boss hands Dilbert a document and says, "I ranked all of your assignments by priority so you won't waste time on unimportant stuff." Dilbert reads the document and says, "Everything is an 'A' priority except for 'Personal life.'" Dilbert says, "this helps a lot." The Boss says, "I'm still working on the list of 'Must do' 'B' priorities."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #united charity, #below average, #pay level, #income, #local agroups, #approved list, #team player, #fund agency, #away from scoiety

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Wally stands in front of Dilbert who is seated at his desk. Wally is reading a piece of paper and says to Dilbert, "Your contributions to 'United Charity' are below average for your pay level." Dilbert says, "Actually, I donate ten percent of my income and thousands of hours to local groups not on your approved list." Wally writes on the sheet, ". . . Not a team player." Dilbert says, "I fund an agency that keeps people like you away from society."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #approved underwear list, #blue jeans, #forbidden clothes, #morale, #new casual dress code, #shorts, #tanktops

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The Boss: "I thought it necessary to provide detailed guidelines to our new casual dress code." "Forbidden clothing includes: shorts, tank tops, tee shirts, shirts with slogans, blue jeans, sneakers and sandals." Dilbert: "My morale is soaring." The Boss: "Appendix 'A' is the approved underwear list."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ratbert, #Dogbert, #rat, #dog, #christmas

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Dogbert hands Ratbert a list and says, "Here's my list of Christmas demands, Ratbert." Dogbert says, "Since you have no money I included items which can be easily shoplifted." Ratbert says, "Thanks." Dogbert says, "Or you can check the box where it says you agree to be my personal valet for life." Ratbert replies, "I need to shoplift a pencil first."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #christmas, #dog

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Dilbert sits on the couch and Dogbert stands on the armrest. Dogbert hands Dilbert a list and says, "Here's a list of my Christmas demands." Dogbert says, "Follow the instructions and nobody gets hurt." Dilbert says, "You're bluffing. You wouldn't hurt my plastic window Santa." Dogbert holds the electric cord to the decoration and says, "One yank and he's off life support!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #business report

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Dilbert hands the Boss a document and says, "Here's my time report, in fifteen minute increments." Dilbert says, "And here's my monthly project status, my budget forecast, my key accomplishments, my jeopardy list . . ." The Boss thinks as Dilbert walks away, "Never has so little been measured so much."