News Comic Strips - Page 15
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Character
166 Results for News
View 141 - 150 results for news comic strips. Discover the best "News" comics from Dilbert.com.
Friday November 29,
1991
Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, ratbert, confirmation, hearing, supreme court, character, witness, nominee, hiney, news, liar, nuts
Transcript
At Dogbert's confirmation hearing, a member of the Senate Judiciary Committee asks Ratbert, "Mister Ratbert, you've been called as a character witness." Ratbert says, "The nominee once called me a little hiney . . ." A picture of Ratbert appears on the front page of a newspaper. The headlines say "Liar!" and "Probably Nuts!!"
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Monday October 07,
1991
Tags Dilbert, world, news, country, doug, tiny, monarchy, king, descendant, deity, head, doesn't
Transcript
Dilbert sits in his chair watching the television news. The newscaster says, "In world news, the tiny country of Elbonia has become a despotic monarchy." The news anchorman continues, "The new ruler is King Dogbert, who claims to be a descendant of the Elbonian Deity 'Doug.'" In Elbonia, Dogbert rides on the back of an Elbonian and hits him on the back of his head. Dogbert is wearing a miter and holding a scepter. Dogbert thinks, "I hope this doesn't go to my head."
Wednesday September 11,
1991
Tags man, george lucas, Dogbert, news, sub-contract, dan, quayle, muppets, film studio, faked, special, effects, company
Transcript
A man says to George Lucas, "There's a dog here to see you, sir. He may be on to our operation." Lucas asks Dogbert, "Yes?" Dogbert says, "I came to find out if the news on television is all faked by your special effects company." Lucas and Dogbert sit at a table. Lucas says, "Actually, we don't do ALL of the news here. We had to sub-contract the Dan Quayle stuff to the Muppets." Dogbert says, "I knew that."
Tuesday September 10,
1991
Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, naked, news, lucas, ranch, dan, life-like, special, effects
Transcript
Dogbert asks Dilbert, "Seriously, how do we know the news isn't all faked??" Dilbert says, "Geez, Dogbert, get over it. Why don't you just call George Lucas and ask him if he's doing the whole thing with special effects?" At the Lucas Ranch, a man holding a mannequin says to George Lucas, "We built a new Dan Rather, but it still doesn't look lifelike." A man sitting at a table plays with a Space Shuttle on a string.
Monday September 09,
1991
Tags Dogbert, Dilbert, faked, hollywood, minutes, world, news, major, stories, string, attached, space, shuttle, reruns
Transcript
Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on the hassock. As they watch television, Dogbert asks, "How do we know that the news isn't faked in Hollywood?" Dogbert continues, "Why is there exactly thirty minutes of world news every night? And why don't major stories ever happen on weekends?" Dogbert points at the tv and says, "And I'm sure I see a string attached to the space shuttle." Dilbert says, "Worse yet, it's a rerun."
Tuesday July 09,
1991
Tags Dilbert, access, news, personal, computer, wrong, paper, article, newspaper, picture
Transcript
Dilbert says to Wally, "I just read that in a few years you will be able to access all of the news and information of the world from your personal computer." Dilbert continues, "You probably saw the same article in today's paper." Wally replies, "I don't read a paper." Dilbert thinks as he walks away, "What's wrong with this picture?"
Wednesday April 24,
1991
Tags news, news reporter, mysterious, circles, aliens, crop circles, crushed, wheat, starts, one, point, outward, formed, around
Transcript
A television reporter holds a microphone and says, "I'm standing at the Wickford wheat fields outside of London, the site of mysterious giant circles, possibly caused by aliens." The reporter asks a man with a backpack, "How do you find these circles of crushed wheat?" The man answers, "My team of experts starts at one point and searches outward until . . ." The man looks behind him where a circle of people tramples the wheat field. He cries, "Good Lord! Another circle has formed around us!!"
Thursday February 21,
1991
Tags Dilbert, news, discovered, anti-gravity, formula, newsworthy, weight, exercising, misleading, unethical, marketing
Transcript
Dilbert floats in mid-air with a propeller attached to his back. He says into the phone, "Hello, ABC News? I've discovered an anti-gravity formula." Dilbert continues, "What?! It's not newsworthy?!" Dogbert says, "Tell him it lets you lose weight without exercising." Dilbert covers the telephone receiver and asks, "Isn't that misleading and unethical?" Dogbert replies, "There's a fine line between marketing and grand theft."
Wednesday February 20,
1991
Tags Dilbert, cbs, news, press, converence, announce, anti-gravity, discovery, suntan, lotion, science, report, interview, string, bikini
Transcript
Dilbert floats through the house with a propeller strapped to his back. He says into the phone, "CBS News? Yes, I'd like to call a press conference to announce my anti-gravity discovery . . ." Dilbert says into the telephone, "Science isn't news?! But you did that investigative report on suntan lotion last year . . ." Dilbert says, "No, I don't think I could do the interview in a string bikini."
Friday January 11,
1991
Tags Dilbert, television, body parts, news, sandwhich, strewn, miles
Transcript
Dilbert sits in a chair watching tv and eating a sandwich. A voice on the television says, ". . . And in the news . . ." The newscaster continues, ". . . Body parts were strewn for miles . . ." The newscaster continues, "So check your sandwich." Dilbert looks shocked.


