Raise Temp Comic Strips - Page 15

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View 141 - 150 results for raise temp comic strips. Discover the best "Raise Temp" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cubicle time, #isn't productive, #set priorities, #projects flounder, #big raise, #either way, #cubicle

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The Boss says to Alice, "Alice, may I have a word with you?" The Boss continues, "You're not spending enough time in your cubicle." The Boss continues, "It looks as if our department isn't productive." Alice responds, "But.. I can't do my job from my cubicle." The Boss replies, "You have to set priorities. Looking productive is very important to this department." Alice clenches her fists in anger. Alice exclaims, "Will I get a big raise for looking busy while my projects flounder?!" The Boss replies, "You won't get a big raise either way." The Boss continues, "Here's a blank piece of paper to carry back to your cubicle." Alice clenches her fists again and cries, "GAAA!!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #temp, #sign time sheet, #permanent position, #dog, #has fake owner, #dilbert clone, #doll, #stand in, #fake person, #animals

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Dilbert walks through the door of his house and says, "Dogbert! I'm ho-o-ome!" Dogbert appears in the doorway and says, "I'll be right there. I have to sign the temp's time sheet." Dilbert walks into the living room and finds a man sitting on a couch in a mask of his face, and Dogbert standing next to him saying, "If you're ever interested in a full-time position, give me a call."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #save money, #firings, #consultants, #flossie, #highly technical work, #invitation, #shake hands, #greeting ritual, #brain overload, #raise rates, #over reacts, #dumb woman, #lost, #freak, #new hire

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The Boss comes into Brian's cubicle and says, "I'm sorry, Brian. I have to fire all my consultants to save money." Brian turns to the Boss and asks, "Who will do your highly technical work?" The Boss brings in a woman and says to Brian, "You can transfer all your knowledge to Flossie." Brian holds out his hand to shake hands and says, "Hi." Flossie grips a pencil in her hand and says, "What's with the hand? Do you want to borrow my pencil?" Brian replies, "Um...no. This is an invitation to shake hands. It's a greeting ritual." Flossie grabs her head and shouts, "OUCH!! Brain overload!! It's too much information!!" Flossie puts both hands on either side of her head and repeats, "Purge! Purge! Purge!" Flossie stares at Brian blankly and says calmly, "Where am I?" Brian thinks to himself, "I need to raise my rates."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #no raise, #not enough questions, #meetings, #care about job, #thirst for knowledge, #likes wood

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Asok the Intern sits across from the Boss. The Boss says, "I can't give you a raise. You don't ask enough questions in meetings." The Boss continues, "Questions show that you care about your job and have a thirst for knowledge." Asok is seen at a staff meeting, hand raised, asking, "Who else likes wood?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #billion shares, #dot com subsidary, #fire everyone, #presdient, #raise, #stock, #promoting

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The Boss says to Dilbert, "I'm promoting you to president of our dot-com subsidiary." The Boss says to Dilbert, "Your job is to fire everyone." Dilbert asks, "Would I get a raise?" The Boss answers, "How does a billion shares of stock sound?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #tape pencil, #hand, #raise, #would be unethical, #ten percent, #hiccup damage, #moral compass

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Asok the Intern watches Wally taping a pencil to the hand of The Boss who is comatose. Wally says, "I'll tape a pencil to his hand and use it to sign off on a raise for me." Asok the Intern says to Wally, "That would be so unethical... hiccup. May I have ten percent?" Wally works on getting the pencil into the comatose Boss' hand as Asok says, "That hiccup damaged my moral compass."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #blank copies, #copied wrong sides, #intern, #new temp, #talk to hand, #tells off

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Asok: These copies you made for me are blank. New Temp: Thats because all the originals were blank. Asok: Maybe you could have checked the other sides, New temp: Talk to the hand.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #agency, #get it, #hand, #joke, #play on words, #dogbert temp

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New Temp: Im from the DOgbert Temp agency, DO you need a hand? Dilbert: I get it, her her! New Temp: Get what? Dilbert: Then I said, "Don't get mad: try counting to fifteen" Wally: Ouch.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #alice, #hand, #head, #new temp, #new temp likes, #shakes hand on head

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New Temp: Its a pleasure to meet you Alice. OOWEE!! That was a good hand shake.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #genetic anamolies, #genetic engineering, #grow on, #hand growing on head, #new temp, #temp agnecy, #wear goggles

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Dogbert: The Dogbert temp agency uses genetic engineering to grow our own workers. The Boss: Isn't that dangerous? Dogbert: I wear safety goggles. Temp: Im the new temp. Alice: Um Im alice.