Ignorance (Knowledge) Comic Strips - Page 15

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

177 Results for Ignorance (Knowledge)

View 141 - 150 results for ignorance (knowledge) comic strips. Discover the best "Ignorance (Knowledge)" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags fall asleep, runny nose, sneaks in, pinches nostrils shut

View Transcript

Transcript

Ratbert: Why does a runny nose stop running when you fall asleep? Dogbert: The nose fairly sneaks in at night and inches your nostrils shut. Ratbert: This is exactly why I don't like knowledge.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags worthless, subject matter expert, narrow field, vague field

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: "People think I'm worthless, but in fact I'm a subject-matter expert in a very narrow field." "It's so narrow that it requires no knowledge whatsoever." Dilbert: "What field is it?" Wally: "There's no way to know for sure."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags paying for consulting, no recommendations, feel secure, shaping strategies, hate you, feel good

View Transcript

Transcript

"I keep paying you for consulting, but you never make any recommendations." "I'm what you call a "feel good."" "My job is to make you feel secure in the knowledge that someone brilliant is shaping your strategies." "This is weird; I hate you, but at the same time I feel good." "You're welcome."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags fear, inventions, machine learning, track customers, machines take over, annihilate all humans

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: Our machine learning technology allows us to track customer preferences and use that knowledge to manipulate them. Dilbert: That seems like the step that happens right before the machines take over the earth and annihilate all humans. CEO: There's always one person in every crowd who says that. Dilbert: Not for much longer, apparently.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags computer, dont breathe, help, rat, software, software consulatant, trying to help, technology, engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Ratbert the software consultant RatBert: Don't let your lack of knowledge interfere with my brilliance. Don't touch the keyboard, don't offer opinions and don't breathe so loudly that I can hear it. Ratbert: There. I've either configured your software or erased something called a bios.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags wally fired, exit interview, manipulation, rigged system, boss, exploding servers

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I don't hold any grudges about being fired for hanging a comic on the wall. The company will be fine without my secret and exclusive knowledge of the critical systems. If the framistan starts to gabol, just purge the cache within sixty seconds and the servers won't explode.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags spaceman, millennium genration, digital age, myspace.com.planet, rule planet, upper body

View Transcript

Transcript

Spaceman: Greetings, Troglodytes. I am from the millennium generation." "I was forged in the digital age. I will use my knowledge of myspace.com and youtube and e-mail to rule this planet. Buwha-haha!!!" Dilbert: Wow, you're right. He doesn't have much upper body strength." Trash

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags good news, raise fist, wireless network, bad news, knowledge, lack of understanding

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss says, "Good news! We won the bid to build a nationwide wireless network!" Dilbert says, "Bad news! We don't know how to build a nationwide wireless network!" Boss says, "It's wireless. How hard could it be to not install wires?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags estimating, mocking, indifference, ignorance, budgets

View Transcript

Transcript

Ellen says, "I need a budget estimate for my project, but I don't have a scope or a design for it yet." Dilbert says, "Okay, my estimate is $3,583,729." Ellen says, "You don't know anything about my project." Dilbert says, "That makes two of us."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags brilliant ideas, carnage, honesty, ignorance, ludicrous ideas, mean spirited, mistaken self image, roll eyes, share project, verbally demolish

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice, I'm hoping we can work together on this project in the spirit of cooperation. I'll have some ideas, and you'll have some ideas, and together we can pick the best ones. Alice: Sure, that's one approach. But I prefer to exhale deeply and roll my eyes while you prattle. Then I will verbally demolish your ludicrous ideas, and dismantle your mistaken self-image as a competent man. The carnage will create a striking contrast for the warm, clear glow of my brilliant ideas. Later, I will round out the package by spreading amusing stories about how ignorant you are. Is there any chance of doing it my way? Alice: Now watch the eyes."