Marketing Claims Comic Strips - Page 15

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249 Results for Marketing Claims

View 141 - 150 results for marketing claims comic strips. Discover the best "Marketing Claims" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business people, #engineers, #skunks, #spray perfumr, #marketing, #engineer, #resist killing, #terrific job, #business, #engineering

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INTRODUCTIONS Coworker: My name is Alan, and my job in Marketing is to spray perfume on skunks. Dilbert: I'm Dilbert. My job as an engineer is to resist killing Alan. Coworker: You're doing a terrific job. Dilbert: Stop spraying me with perfume! Introductions

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #assumption, #business ethics, #buy prodcuts, #corporate strategy, #corporation, #customer centric, #etiquette & ethics, #evil, #executives, #ideas, #marketing campaign, #monopoly, #needs, #needs of customers, #psychological manipulation

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CEO: I welcome any input on our corporate strategy. Dilbert: I think we need to be more customer-centric. CEO: You mean raise our prices? Dilbert: I mean focus on the needs of our customers. CEO: You mean we should be a monopoly so they need us? Dilbert: Um, no. We should find out what they need and then give it to them. CEO: They need to buy our products. Dilbert: They probably don't. CEO: So you're saying our marketing campaign should use psychological manipulation to make people think they need our products. You finally had a good idea. Dilbert: I'm going to stop talking now.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #buy things, #deception, #evil, #evil tool, #images, #lab notes, #marketing, #obliviousness, #presentation, #screen, #unique sequence, #business

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Dilbert: I discovered a unique sequence of sights and sounds that makes people buy things they don't need. I recommend that we destroy all of my lab notes and rid the world of this evil tool. CEO: You never told him what marketing is? Boss: He didn't need to know.

Engineers Built Everything That Matters

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Engineers Built Everything That Matters - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #engineers, #importance, #marketing, #wages, #pay scale, #modern civilization, #need both, #marketing guy, #business, #money

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The Marketing Guy. Marketing Guy: I don't see why engineers get paid more than marketing professionals. Dilbert: Maybe because engineers designed and built every important part of modern civilization and all you did was misrepresent it. Marketing Guy: My point is that you need both. Dilbert: You really don't.

Brainstorm With Other Engineers

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Brainstorm With Other Engineers - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #product design, #managers, #marketing, #simplicity, #complication, #inventions, #ideas, #business

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Boss: Our marketing people tell me your double-handed coffee mug could be a huge seller. Brainstorm with the other engineers and see if it needs more features. Wally: Do you have any other ideas for ruining the product, or should I focus on that one?

Being More Honest

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Being More Honest - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #marketing, #advertising, #honesty, #cover-up, #performance, #shortcoming, #business

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Dilbert: My tests show we underperform our competition on nine out of eleven dimensions. Boss: Give the two good ones to Marketing. We can't be more honest than that. Dilbert: I'm almost certain we can. Boss: No, we really can't.

Ted Has Fly Brain

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Ted Has Fly Brain - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #greeting card, #sick, #brain damage, #marketing, #advertising, #mindless, #business, #medical

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Carol: Sign this card for Ted. A fly went up his nose and laid eggs in his brain. Dilbert: Is he coming back to work? Carol: We think he'll live out his days in Marketing.

Addictive Apps

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Addictive Apps - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #technology, #app, #zombie, #mindlessness, #cell phone, #marketing, #business

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Boss: Our plan is to use design psychology to make our apps more addictive. Ideally, we want to strip people of their free will and turn them into mindless upgrading zombies. Dilbert: I'd feel better if we called that "marketing." Boss: I need you to be more mindless, too.

Sales Is Blaming Marketing

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Sales Is Blaming Marketing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #sales, #responsibility, #blame, #business

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Boss: Our salespeople are blaming Marketing for the low demand. Marketing is blaming Engineering for making a product no one wants. So I blamed our customers for misleading us about their needs. Asok: Now I don't feel so bad about our price-gouging.

Explaining Block Chain To Marketing

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Explaining Block Chain To Marketing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #jargon, #explanation, #teaching, #language, #education

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Alice: This would be a perfect application for blockchain. Man: I'm in marketing. Can you explain that in terms I can understand? Alice: I kinda doubt it. Man: Because your a bad explainer, right?