Ruin Career Comic Strips - Page 15

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

206 Results for Ruin Career

View 141 - 150 results for ruin career comic strips. Discover the best "Ruin Career" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #new hircut, #gargantuan, #mistake, #frighten children, #froze up, #Opinion

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert asks the rat and Dogbert, "What do you guys think about my new haircut?" Dogbert says, "It's a gargantuan mistake that will ruin your life, frighten children, and bruise fruit." Dogbert turns to the rat. The rat exclaims, "I'm all froze up! No one ever asked for my opinion before!"

Dilbert Characters

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #new guy, #no assignment, #looking for project, #ineffectual, #good attendance, #head nodding

View Transcript

Transcript

A new employee approaches Dilbert and says, "I'm a new guy with no assignment. I'm looking for a project to horn into." The new employee continues, "But don't be threatened by me. I'm exceptionally ineffectual." The new employee continues, "I'm trying to build a career based on good attendance and head-nodding."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #emergency meeting, #five minutes, #warm and cozy, #cubicle paradise, #sound of not caring

View Transcript

Transcript

Carol enters Dilbert's cubicle and says, "There's an emergency strategy meeting in five minutes." Dilbert responds, "I was all warm and cozy in my cubicle paradise. Why must you ruin it?" Carol puts her hand up to her ear and asks, "Can you hear the sound of me not caring?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #alice, #rich guy, #care about personality, #hugged too tight

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice gets downsized. Wally: "Maybe your next career could be marrying a rich guy." "There must be a guy out there who wouldn't care about your personality." "If she offers you a goodbye hug, don't take it."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #speak at school, #sons school, #disguise bitterness, #punish son, #honored to speak

View Transcript

Transcript

Carol: "Would you consider speaking at my son's school on career day?" "I'd do it myself, but I can't disguise the bitterness and despair that gnaw at my soul." "Plus my son has been bad and I told him I'd punish him." The boss: "I'd be honored to speak."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #advice for cousin, #carerradvice, #dilmon, #frustrated work environement, #scratch out meager living

View Transcript

Transcript

Your cousin Lauren just got her degree in English. Can you give her some career advice? "Would you enjoy scratching out a meager living in a frustrating work environment?" "I've never thought about it." "Obviously."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #evil director, #human resources, #help balancing, #personal life, #no love, #sound sunhealthy, #pill crybaby, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: Evil Director of Human Resources. "I need help balancing my career with my personal life." "I recommend a book called "No one will ever love you." It'll crush your hope for a personal life and free up more time for work." "That sounds unhealthy." "Take a pill, crybaby."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

"Wally, after I left the meeting yesterday, did you blame me for the failure of the project?" "I'm getting a bad vibe from people today. That sort of rumor could stain my reputation and ruin my entire future." "How dare you accuse me..." "Well, well. Look who's impeding Wally again."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

"And that's how I made a billion dollars in shady real estate deals." "The moral of the story is that crime doesn't pay..." "Directly; it goes through escrow." "Dogbert, don't ruin the rat."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

"Our project scope has vastly expanded, so we'll all need to pull together as a team." "Is it too late for me to bail out before this project becomes a blight on my career?" "I already put the team photo on our coffee cups." "GAAA!!!"