Share Ideas Comic Strips - Page 15

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

205 Results for Share Ideas

View 141 - 150 results for share ideas comic strips. Discover the best "Share Ideas" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 23, 2007's comic on:


Tags #quagmire, #alien, #highly advanced intelligence, #genius

View Transcript

Transcript

Alien: I am an alien with highly advanced intelligence. I have come to share my genius with this company. Asok: Me too. But they don't like that sort of thing here. It's a quagmire."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 04, 2007's comic on:


View Transcript

Transcript

I need to quantify the benefits of our department. Any ideas? "I recommend dishonesty." "Would that work?" "It made me the man I am today."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 15, 2012's comic on:


Tags #business ethics, #mergers & acquisitions, #google, #100 million, #engineers, #jump ship, #ceo, #buy out

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: Google offered to buy our company for $100 million just to get our engineers. Dilbert: Huh. I wonder if I can convince the other engineers to jump ship today and share $100 million amongst us. CEO: What did he just say? Dilbert: Nothing. Just thinking out loud.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 25, 2012's comic on:


Tags #boredom, #secretaries (office), #mindless and repetetive, #task, #spur creativity, #creative person, #dispose of body, #snide, #snarky

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Experts say that doing mindless and repetitive tasks is a good way to spur creativity. That means you must be the most creative person in the office. Did you come up with any ideas? Carol: Yup. So far, I've come up with over seven hundred ways to dispose of your body.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 08, 2013's comic on:


Tags #cruelty, #monsters, #taxes, #sadistic monster, #income tax code, #complicated, #regressive tax codes, #like minds

View Transcript

Transcript

Monster: The best part of being a sadistic monster is that my job is to write the income tax code. Look how complicated I made it. Hee hee! Dogbert: You do good work, Stanky. Monster: But is it regressive enough? Dogbert: It's like we share a brain because you keep saying what I'm thinking.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 18, 2013's comic on:


Tags #conversation, #deception, #political reasons, #irrational nonsense, #filter

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Your plan is technically sound, but I have to reject it for political reasons I can't share. Dilbert: I'll come back with some plans that are irrational nonsense and see if they make it past your filter. Boss: I'll always wonder if there was a better way to handle that.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 15, 2008's comic on:


Tags #5 minute huddle, #high energy, #standup meeting, #solved in minute

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: I want the entire staff to meet at 10 A.M. every day for a five-minute huddle. The Boss: We'll use this high-energy stand-up meeting to solve problems and share successes. The Boss: Who has a problem that can be solved in a minute?"Wally: I'm tired. Can I sit on you?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 16, 2008's comic on:


Tags #success, #5 minute daily huddle, #obstacles

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Who has some success to share at our 5-minute daily huddle? The Boss: Okay...Are there any obstacles? Asok: Everything.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 24, 2010's comic on:


Tags #talk over people, #jumbled typ face, #escalate, #lisening, #fun part

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert says, "I've decided to escalate my anti-social behavior from not listening, to actively talking over other people." Dilbert says, "How can you enjoy the conversation of others if you don't listen?" Dogbert says, "This could be one of the best ideas I've ever had." Dogbert says, "It all came together when I realized that listening isn't the fun part."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 30, 2009's comic on:


Tags #investing, #rudeness, #firing, #downsizing

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert says, "Your stock fell a penny a share so I bough 51% of the company." Dogbert says, "I'll double my investment just by firing you." Dogbert says, "Thanks for not being totally worthless." Man says, "You're welcome."