Want Wool Comic Strips - Page 15

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842 Results for Want Wool

View 141 - 150 results for want wool comic strips. Discover the best "Want Wool" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 08, 1994's comic on:


Tags #budget analyst, #budget cuts, #intelligent choices, #understand enginering, #strategy

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The Boss: Susan, I want you to make some budget cuts throughout my department. Susan: But Im only the budget analyst. I couldn't understand all the engineering projects enough to make intelligent choices. The Boss: Really? Great! I thought it was just me! Susan: Shall I whomp up a strategy while Im at it?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 25, 1994's comic on:


Tags #world ends, #year 2000, #creator, #universe, #counting system, #round numbers, #feeling anxiety, #dog, #rat, #conversation, #animals

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Dogbert: "I'm predicting the world will end in the year 2000." "The creator of the universe works in mysterious ways. But he uses a base ten counting system and likes round numbers." "So you really want to avoid being, let's say, in mobile home number 1,000,000 in the year 2000." Ratbert: "I'm feeling anxiety."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 04, 1994's comic on:


Tags #quality training, #promoted, #management, #lobotomy, #footsteps

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Dilbert: "The only way to get ahead in this company is by getting promoted to management." "I'm willing to do whatever it takes to get promoted. I want to follow in your footsteps." "But I'm wondering if a lobotomy is actually necessary." "No, we'll just run you through 'quality training'."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 05, 1994's comic on:


Tags #corporate politics, #waste basket, #teach everything, #promoted level

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Dilbert: I want you to teach me everything you know about corporate politics so I can get promoted to your level. The Boss: To truly understand office politics you must wear a waste basket on your head for one full day. LATER Dilbert: Does this really work? The Boss: It works for me.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 06, 1994's comic on:


Tags #about co workers, #donuts, #get prompted, #say bad things, #weight, #woman, #medical

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DOGBERT: If you want to get promoted , say bad things about co workers so you look better by comparison. Dilbert: Geez, Lisa, It looks like you've been hotting the donuts pretty hard lately. Dilbert: heh-hehe...big things are coming my way soon.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 21, 1994's comic on:


Tags #big money, #deal, #dog, #Dogbert, #executive, #mercury dimes, #negotiate, #static network, #stock, #static for sale, #animals

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CEO: We'll give you sixty billion for the "dogcart static network" half f that will be stock in our company. Dogbert: Who would want stock in a company that would pay city billion for static? CEO: Not us thats the point. Dogbert: Id like it all in mercury dimes.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 23, 1994's comic on:


Tags #new wealth, #build amusement park, #thrilling rides, #wedgie, #restrooms, #customers, #build park

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Dogbert: I plan to use my new wealth to build an amusement park. Dogbert: Dogbertland will have thrilling rides like "The wedgie" and I'll have a maze in front of the restrooms. Dilbert: The customers will hate this. Dogbert: If they want fun they can build their own park.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 27, 1994's comic on:


Tags #upgrade boss computer, #cardboard prop, #came with desk, #new mother board, #new desk, #needs, #no actual computer

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The Boss: "I want you to help me upgrade the computer in my office." Dilbert: "The computer in your office is a cardboard prop that came with your desk." The Boss: "So, I need a new motherboard, right?" Dilbert: "No, you need a new desk."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 18, 1994's comic on:


Tags #arch nemesis, #ttp, #ttp project, #join

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Dilbert: Wally would you like to be on my 'TTP' project? Wally: What does 'TTP' stand for? Dilbert: Its short for the TTP Project. Dilbert: I named it myself, So, do you want to join? wally: Id rather be your arch nemesis.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 15, 1994's comic on:


Tags #city soccer league, #never played, #natural instinct, #ball trajectory, #team play, #ruin concentration

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"I joined the city soccer league." "I've never played, but as an engineer I have a natural instinct for ball trajectory and passing angles." "Where does the team play?" "Coach doesn't want to ruin my concentration by telling me."