More Office Space Comic Strips - Page 16

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View 151 - 160 results for more office space comic strips. Discover the best "More Office Space" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #reverse psychology, #goal, #opposite of wants, #space shuttle launch, #alice desk

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Alice is angry and walks away from Mordac. She says, "I'm not using reverse psychology! I really don't need anything from the information technology department." Mordac follows. Mordac shakes his fist and says, "Curse you! You know our goal is to give you the opposite of what you want. If you want nothing, we must give you everything!" Dilbert stands behind Alice at her computer. He clasps his hands together and begs, "Please tell me how you got them to do this." Alice's computer is heaped with gadgets: satelitte dish, hard drives, video cameroas, modems, etc. Alice says, 'Watch me launch the space shuttle!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #joined late, #dinosaur, #hiding behind furniture, #space

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Dilbert says, "For those who joined us late, this is Bob the Dinosaur. He lives with Dilbert and me." Bob says, "Hi." Dogbert says, "Dinosaurs aren't extinct, they're just hiding behind the furniture." Dinosaur Bob says, "This is Dawn, my mate, and little Rex." Rex waves. Dobbert says, "You'll notice that they use a lot of space and they aren't very relevent." Bob says, "I think Rex has my eyes."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dinosaurs, #downsized, #fate, #vote by email, #jimmy carter, #monitor voting

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Dogbert says, "Should the Dinosaurs be downsized? You decide their fate." Bob, Dawn and Rex stand to one side looking worried. Vote by email: dinosaurs@unitedmedia.com A: I love the dinosaurs! B: Stick to office jokes! C: No talking animals! D: I don't have an opinion, but I like to vote! E: Get rid of everyone so I can use the blank space for notes. Ratbert says, 'There's a Jimmy Carter here to monitor the voting." Dogbert says, "Uh-oh."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #coached well, #date, #date analyzer, #cubicle fibers, #office job

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Dilbert arrives for his date. A woman opens the door and Dilbert says, "Grunt, grunt. Absolutely right. Grunt, grunt, grunt." Dilbert says, "Grunt, grunt, grunt." She says, 'Someone coached you well for this date. You haven't said a thing I object to yet." Dilbert is strapped to a huge microscope labled, "Date-alyzer." He says, "Grunt." She stands at the control panel and says, "I see cubicle fibers... you have an office job."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #pressure makes diamonds, #garbage more compact, #slogans, #meeting, #strong job market, #engineers, #irritation makes perals, #pressure makes whine, #business

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At the staff meeting, The Boss says, "Our new slogan is Pressure Makes Diamonds." Wally sits to one side. Wally says,"How about Pressure Makes Garbage More Compact? I wonder if that one is taken." Dilbert looks on as The Boss frowns. The Boss walks out followed by Wally, who says, "Irritation Makes Pearls. Or maybe Pressure Makes Whine." The Boss thinks, "I hate this strong job market for engineers."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #men 25% more pay, #math skills, #praise for math skills, #33% more

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Tina the tech writer points to an open magazine on the table and says, "This article says men are paid 25% more than women. How do you explain that?" Dilbert and Wally stare. Wally picks up the magazine. The cover features a woman and the title "Estro." Wally says, "Actually, it says women make 75} for every dollar that men make. That's 33% more for men." Tina crosses her arms and frowns. Wally says, "I suppose there's almost no chance you'll praise me for my math skills right now."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office supplies, #underfunded, #three ring binder, #spare office supplies

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Rag Man asks Wally, "Can you spare anuy office supplies? I'm on an underground project." Wally asks, "How about a three-ring binder with one ring?" Rag Man says, "Score!" Rag Man says, "I'll melt into the background and let you get back to your palace and your fancy coffee." Wally clarifies, "It's a mocha."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #no layoffs, #after merger, #Catbert, #evil director, #frozen asteroid, #protective space suits, #not a team player

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Caption: "Catbert: Evil H.R. Director" Catbert tells Ted and Dilbert, "There will be no layoffs after the merger." Catbert says, "However, many of you will be transferred to jobs on a frozen." Ted asks, "Will we have protective space suits?" Catbert says, "I label you 'not a team player'."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #fertility drug, #doctors office, #babies, #woman involved, #diapers, #prescription, #painful shots

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Dilbert in doctor's office. Dilbert asks the doctor, "My dog slipped me a fertility drug. How soon before I give birth?" The doctor says, "Um...it's impossible to have babies unless a woman is involved in some way." Dilbert says, "Ooh, right, for the diapers." The doctor says, "I'm going to give you a prescription for painful shots."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #telephone shyness, #make business calls, #restroom, #shyness passes, #Dilbert, #office

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Dilbert in his cubicle in his office next to his computer staring at the phone thinking, "I'm having a severe case of telephone shyness." Dilbert thinking, "I'm afraid to pick up the phone and make business calls." Dilbert entering the restroom thinking, "I'll duck into a restroom stall until the shyness passes."