Lost Money Comic Strips - Page 16

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View 151 - 160 results for lost money comic strips. Discover the best "Lost Money" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #software emoire, #net wealth, #twenty billion., #popular opinion, #sunset, #license digital rights

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Dilbert and Dogbert are taking a walk outside. Dogbert says, "Thanks to my software empire, my net worth is twenty billion dollars." Dogbert sits on a log and says, "Contrary to popular opinion, it does seem to make me happy." Dilbert responds, "Money can't buy a sunset, Dogbert." Dogbert says, "No, but I was able to license the digital rights."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #forget them, #quietly supportuive, #too many passwords, #with draw money, #phone messages

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Dilbert lies on the couch looking worried and Dogbert sits on the backrest. Dilbert says, "I have too many passwords in my life. What if I forget them?" Dogbert's ears fly up and he shouts, "You'd lose your job! You wouldn't be able to withdraw money or check phone messages! You'd be dead in a week!" Dilbert's hair and tie fly up and he says, "That would have been a good time to be quietly supportive, Dogbert." Dogbert responds, "Oh, yeah, that's a lot of fun."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business plan, #start up, #provide venture capital, #lost of media, #afraid of dogs, #media hype, #greeting investors, #prospectus

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Dogbert, Dilbert and Wally sit at a table. Dogbert says, "The business plan for your start-up is idiotic but I'm going to provide the venture capital funding anyway." Dogbert continues, "We'll generate lots of media hype, go public and make millions by shafting greedy and ignorant investors." Dogbert continues, "The Latin word for 'close your eyes and open your mouth' is 'prospectus.'" Wally says, "This is exactly why I'm afraid of dogs."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #corporate vice presdient, #win bet, #action plan, #spend money, #vice president, #annoying rodent

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Dogbert says to Ratbert, "Remember everything I taught you, Ratbert. If you can pass yourself off as a corporate vice president, I'll win my bet." Ratbert stands on a desk and says to Wally as he walks by, "Yo, Headcount! If you have any issues, put together an action plan. Our people are the best. Don't spend money." Wally asks Alice, "Do you think he's really a vice president?" Alice answers, "Maybe. But I'm not ready to rule out 'annoying rodent' yet." In the background Ratbert says, "Quality."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #catbert hr director, #went nuts, #vending machine, #offer counseling, #more economical, #death penalty, #possible, #microwave oven

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Catbert says to Dilbert, "This report says you went nuts at a vending machine because it took your money." Dilbert sits with his arms crossed over his chest. Catbert continues, "The company used to offer counseling in these cases. But we found it was more economical to apply the death penalty." Dilbert looks shocked. Dilbert asks, "What?! How is that possible?" Catbert replies, "I'm not sure yet. You're too big for the microwave oven . . ."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #vending machine, #stole money, #sentenced to death, #director human resources, #desensitized, #tragic news, #execution is scheduled

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Dilbert arrives at home carrying a briefcase. Dogbert sits on the couch reading the newspaper. Dilbert says to Dogbert, "Today was a bad day. First the vending machine stole my money . . ." Dilbert continues, ". . . And by the end of the day I had been sentenced to death by the director of human resources . . ." Dogbert reads and hums as he ignores Dilbert. Still reading the paper, Dogbert says, "I've become totally desensitized to tragic news!" Dilbert says, "The execution is scheduled for tomorrow. I should call in sick."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dogcart versus catbert, #dilbert death, #bob the donosuar, #fur wedgie, #lost paperwork, #ordering execustion

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The caption says, "Dogbert versus Catbert." Dogbert stands on Catbert's desk and says, "I understand you've sentenced Dilbert to death." Catbert asks, "Is that a problem?" Bob the Dinosaur stands behind Dogbert and looks menacing. Dogbert says, "My assistant, Bob the Dinosaur, will now demonstrate how to give a cat a 'fur wedgie.'" Dilbert arrives at home carrying a briefcase. He says to Dogbert, "I've been pardoned. Somehow they lost the paperwork ordering my execution." Dogbert responds, "It probably fell into a crack."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dances, #dancing dogs, #go wild, #healed, #healthy, #invoice, #poems, #primal screams, #tech me, #total well being

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Dogbert, who is wearing a wizard's hat, stands on the desk in Alice's cubicle. Dogbert asks, "Have my poems and dances healed your soul yet, Alice? The company cares about your total well being." Alice says, "Excuse me." Alice leans over the cubicle wall and shouts at the Boss, "We want more MONEY, not more dancing dogs!!! M-O-N-E-Y!! The Boss and Dilbert sit at a conference table. The Boss says, "So you're saying those primal screams are healthy? Can you teach me to do it?" Dogbert says, "Here's my invoice - go wild."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #another banner week, #accomplishements, #streamlined, #business process, #valuing diversity, #mandatory training vidoes, #lost free will

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Wally, Dilbert, Alice and the Boss sit at a conference table. Wally says, "I'm pleased to report another banner week of accomplishments!" Wally continues, "I streamlined my business processes while honing my participatory style and my proactive attitude, all while valuing diversity!" The Boss asks, "You watched the mandatory training videos?" Wally adds, "And I lost my free will!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #wally compensation, #equalibrium, #project, #lower quality, #consistent, #salary, #first month, #after raises, #achieved equilibrium, #money

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The Boss, Alice, Wally and Dilbert sit at a conference table. Wally says, "This week I kicked off the 'Wally Compensation Equilibrium Project.'" Wally continues, "My goal is to lower the quality of my work until it is consistent with my salary." The Boss thinks, "I hate the first month after they see their raises." Wally says, "I'd go on, but I just achieved equilibrium."