Until Intimate Comic Strips - Page 16

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

405 Results for Until Intimate

View 151 - 160 results for until intimate comic strips. Discover the best "Until Intimate" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dont email, #cucbilce, #manage and review, #reveiwed, #can't release

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Dilbert, "Don't e-mail your answer to my boss until I've reviewed it." Dilbert responds, "Um... Okay." Dilbert asks, "May I walk to my cubicle now or would you like to review the route first?" The Boss replies, "Now that you mentioned it, I can't release."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #demoted, #spread rumors, #new boss, #fired, #clueless human, #doesn't work, #denial

View Transcript

Transcript

Headline: Demoted. The Boss says to Wally, "I plan to spread rumors about our new boss until I'm fired." The Boss continues, "I'll tell everyone that he's the most clueless human that ever lived. Hee hee!" Wally responds, "Believe me, that doesn't work." The Boss says, "I have no idea what you're talking about."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #exclusive cable contarct, #monkey, #monkeys version, #procurement manager, #rope as electric, #rope vendor, #animals

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert points to a slide and says, "My technology test was a huge failure because I had to use a rope as my electronic cable." Dilbert continues, "Our procurement manager is a monkey who signed an exclusive cable contract with a rope vendor." The Boss says to Dilbert, "I'd rather not take sides until I hear the monkey's version."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #be charming, #more important, #project thwarted, #seriously hound her, #unhelpful, #woman, #application, #boss advice

View Transcript

Transcript

A woman says into the phone, "I'll get to your application as soon as I have nothing more important to do." Dilbert is on the other end of the line. He says, "Okay.. thank you very much." Dilbert hangs up the phone and thinks, "I just thanked someone for doing nothing." Dilbert enters The Boss' office and says, "My project is being thwarted by a woman who gets satisfaction from being unhelpful." The Boss responds, "Have you tried using your charm?" Dilbert says, "I guess I can try." The Boss replies, "Ha ha ha! Just kidding." The Boss says, "But seriously, try hounding her until she recoils in pain at the sound of your voice." Dilbert asks, "Will that work?" The Boss replies, "Sometimes the best you can do is make other people feel bad."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #telecommuted for 4 years, #fired, #unemployment, #empowerment, #sixth sense

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert, Allen, and Wally are eating lunch. Allen says, "I telecommuted for four years without knowing until today that I'd been fired." Allen continues, "Apparently unemployment feels exactly like empowerment." Allen continues, "This is just like that movie, 'The Sixth Sense.' Did you like that movie, Wally?... Wally?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #set up meeting, #customer, #technology, #humiliating, #poor, #fgreat food

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss and Dilbert are still in barrels. The Boss says, "Set up a meeting with the customer so we can demonstrate our technology." Dilbert responds, "It's humiliating because we're so poor now. What will I feed them?" Dilbert pours cat food into bowls for the customers. He says, "If you think the food is great, wait until you see our technology!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #feasibility analysis, #two years, #obsolete, #project can't succeed, #credible in market, #stupid things, #complete waste, #behind schedule

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert hands The Boss a piece of paper and says, "I completed the feasibility analysis." Dilbert continues, "It would take us two years to build a product that will be obsolete one year from now." The Boss replies, "Okay, let's get started." Dilbert says, "Um.. No, the point is project can't succeed." The Boss responds, "We want people to think we're developing this sort of product, so we'll be credible in the market." Dilbert says, "So our plan is to do stupid things until we appear credible?" The Boss replies, "Exactly!" Dilbert walks away and exclaims, "Gaaa!! My life is a complete waste!!" The Boss says to Catbert, "Tomorrow I'll ask him why he's behind schedule." Catbert responds, "Very evil. Nicely done."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business attire, #changing dress code, #clothing style, #sartorial alchemy lab, #might spark

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss points to a slide and says, "Our dress code policy will go back to business attire." The Boss continues, "And I will keep changing the dress code until I find the clothing style that makes our profits go up!" Headline: Later, At The Sartorial Alchemy Lab. The Boss and Catbert are both wearing safety goggles. A shirt is being hung from a machine and The Boss is holding out a shoe. The Boss says, "Watch out. This might spark."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dental floss, #newly hored, #peeved eve, #peeved expression, #public flossing!, #piss off, #annoyed, #peeve, #hate, #get to hate, #bug, #provoke, #tease, #prop, #objectify

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally is sitting at his computer. Dilbert approaches and says, "Grab your dental floss and follow me. I'll explain on the way." Wally replies, "Okay." As they're walking, Dilbert says to Wally, "The newly hired mutant is named 'Peeved Eve.' Wait until you see her peeved facial expression." Wally replies, "Hee hee!" Wally flosses in Peeved Eve's face. Peeved Eve makes her peeved face and exclaims, "Gaaa! Public flossing!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #chronic mahjobbis, #puke, #doctor, #exam, #diagnosis, #user interfaces, #designed by engineers, #interface poisoning, #dead in a week, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss points to a slide and says, "Our dress code policy will go back to business attire." The Boss continues, "And I will keep changing the dress code until I find the clothing style that makes our profits go up!" Headline: Later, At The Sartorial Alchemy Lab. The Boss and Catbert are both wearing safety goggles. A shirt is being hung from a machine and The Boss is holding out a shoe. The Boss says, "Watch out. This might spark."