Get Raise Comic Strips - Page 16

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196 Results for Get Raise

View 151 - 160 results for get raise comic strips. Discover the best "Get Raise" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 22, 1997's comic on:


Tags #save money, #copier ink, #add water, #copies light, #compensate, #darken, #implement, #Dilbert, #creative thinker, #implantation task, #bigger raise, #creative way

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Wally tells the Boss, "I have a great idea to save money." Wally enter the Boss's office and continues, "We can make the photocopier ink last longer by adding water to it." The Boss asks, "Wouldn't that make the copies too light?" Wally replies, "Ordinarily, yes. But we can compensate by setting the copier to 'darken.'" Wally says, "You'll need someone to implement this idea . . . Let's see." Wally says, "Hey, how about Dilbert? He isn't doing much work lately." Wally continues, "I'd do it myself but there's no reason to waste a creative thinker on an implementation task." Dilbert asks Wally, "Are you still mad that I got a bigger raise than you did?" Wally replies, "No, I found a creative way to deal with it."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 06, 1997's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #bearer bad news, #wally fired, #videos, #stealing stuff, #one percent raise

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Dogbert says, "Wally, your boss asked me to tell you . . ." Dogbert shouts, "You're fired!!! And they have secret videos of you stealing stuff!!!" Wally looks shocked and his tie stands up straight. Wally covers his eyes and says, "This can't be true." Dogbert replies, "It's not. But watch how happy you are when I tell you about your one percent raise."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 12, 1997's comic on:


Tags #cactus shreiks, #cold, #freezing, #other warm, #raise temp, #wally shirtless

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Alice shivers and wraps her arms around herself. She thinks, "It's freezing in here." Alice thinks, "I'll just give the thermostat a little bump." Wally approaches Alice wearing only a tie and underwear. Wally asks, "Can we at least agree that when my cactus shrieks in agony, it's too warm?" Alice replies, "It wasn't shrieking BEFORE you took your shirt off."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 18, 1997's comic on:


Tags #Catbert, #evil hr dierctor, #life insurance policy, #raise blood pressure, #dangerous levels, #fifty time salary, #ceo

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Catbert peers over a wall and says, "Wally, the company bought a life insurance policy on you." Catbert explains, "Our plan is to raise your blood pressure to dangerous levels." Catbert asks, "Did you know that our CEO makes fifty times your salary even though our stock is down?" Wally covers his ears and shouts, "Ow! Ow! Ow!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 29, 1997's comic on:


Tags #banning cartoons, #anti management, #hurt morale, #banning humor, #raise morale, #not funny

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The Boss stands behind Dilbert's desk and says, "I'm banning the posting of anti-management cartoons in the office. They hurt morale." Dilbert asks, "You're banning humor to raise morale?" The Boss asks, "Is there something wrong with that?" Dilbert shows the Boss a newspaper and says, "It's the subject of today's cartoon." The Boss asks, "And you see how it's not funny?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 14, 1997's comic on:


Tags #raise didn't go, #secretary, #didn't do paperwork, #initite disciplinary actions, #disciplinary action forms

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Dilbert tells the Boss, "My raise didn't go through because your secretary didn't do the paperwork." Dilbert continues, "I demand that you initiate disciplinary actions against her!" The Boss says, "I'll try, but . . ." The Boss stands behind Carol's desk and asks, "Carol, could you get me one of those disciplinary action forms?" Carol replies, "Sure, right after my ski trip to hell."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 13, 1997's comic on:


Tags #haven't submitted paperwork, #raise, #show up, #talk to boss, #too busy, #secretary needs secretary

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Dilbert asks the Boss's secretary, "Carol, do you know why my raise hasn't showed up in my pay yet?" Carol replies, "I haven't submitted the paperwork." Carol says, "I'm too busy to do it. Maybe you should talk to my boss about getting me a secretary." Dilbert says, "Carol, YOU are the secretary." Carol replies, "That'll cost you another month."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 03, 1996's comic on:


Tags #enter profession, #huge difference, #self esteem, #corporate trainer, #downsizing

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Ratbert sits on a file cabinet and tells Dilbert, "I'm going to enter a profession that will make a huge difference in my self-esteem." Ratbert continues, "I'll be a corporate trainer in a company that's downsizing." Dilbert asks, "Are you sure that will raise your self-esteem?" Ratbert asks, "Why would I want to RAISE it?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 25, 1996's comic on:


Tags #effective raise, #evil, #mr catbert, #moving, #slow motion

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Wally asks Catbert, "When will my raise be effective?" Catbert replies, "The same time you are." The caption says, "The evil Mr. Catbert, Director of H.R., is feeling 'in the zone.'" Catbert sits at his desk thinking, "It's as if all the employees are moving in slow motion."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 10, 1996's comic on:


Tags #offered pormotion, #another department, #snail crud, #fantasy, #reality, #current assignment, #too valuable, #comapny, #raise, #valuable assignment, #why low morale, #breath

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Dilbert stands in front of the Boss's desk and says, "I've been offered a promotion in another department." The caption says, "Fantasy." Dilbert says, "I'm outta here, you worthless piece of snail crud!!" Dilbert laughs wickedly. The caption says, "Reality." Dilbert says, "I meekly request to be released from my current assignment." The caption says, "Fantasy." The Boss says, "I would never stand in your way. Congratulations!" The caption says, "Reality." The Boss says, "I can't release you. You're too valuable." The caption says, "Fantasy." Dilbert pulls the Boss's tie and says, "If I'm so valuable, explain my last raise!!!" The caption says, "Reality." The Boss says, "In fact, I have ANOTHER valuable assignment for you." Dilbert stands in stunned silence. Dilbert tells Wally, I'm doing a survey to find out why morale is so low." Wally replies, "I think it's your breath."