Saved Money Comic Strips - Page 16

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626 Results for Saved Money

View 151 - 160 results for saved money comic strips. Discover the best "Saved Money" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #laziness, #money, #billion dollars, #stop working, #self defeating

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Dilbert: If you made a billion dollars, would you stop working? Wally: How would I make a billion dollars? Dilbert: You would have to start working. Wally: It seems sort of self-defeating.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #money, #trees, #computer model, #genetically modify, #tree growth, #rare earth minerals, #run a trail, #money dents grow on trees, #fault

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Dilbert: My computer model indicates that I can genetically modify a tree to grow leaves made of rare earth minerals. All I need is a hundred dollars to run a trial. Boss: Sorry. Money doesn't grow on trees. Dilbert: Well, now we know whose fault that is. Boss: Strangers?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #money, #rich people, #being rich, #income inequality, #happy, #networth, #thousand times, #800 times, #net worth

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Dogbert: I like a lot of things about being rich, but I like the income inequality the best. It makes me happy to know that my net worth is about a thousand times more than yours. Dilbert: It's actually closer to 800 times my net worth. Dogbert: You ruined it!!!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #hypocrisy, #managers & supervisors, #wages, #world records set, #best employee, #job performance, #no raise, #drug enhancing drugs, #injected against will, #leadership, #business, #money

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Boss: You've set several world records for best employee job performance. But I can't give you a raise because you used job performance enhancing drugs. Dilbert: You injected me against my will. Boss: It would be leadership if you wanted to do it.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #crime victims, #embarrassment, #lost money, #phishing scam, #questioning support, #stifle laugh

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Boss; I lost all of my money to a phishing scam. Catbert: Must... stifle... laugh. Mmmph! Pressure is building. Must contain... \\ Boss: Are you being supportive? I can't tell. Catbert: Mmmph!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #efficiency experts, #friendship, #money, #you won't quit, #friends at work, #pay less, #relationships

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Boss: Experts say you'll be more engaged if you have a friend at work. And when you're engaged, I can pay you less and you won't quit. Dilbert: So this guy is costing me money? Wally: Don't flatter yourself. I barely know your name.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #big business, #money, #obliviousness, #travel budget, #business travel, #long term profitability, #budget frozen

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Boss: The travel budget is frozen so we can meet our income estimates for this quarter. Dilbert: Is that because all business travel is a waste of time or because we no longer care about long-term profitability? Take as long as you need. Boss: Um...

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #avarice, #deception, #money, #online marketplace, #dumb criminals, #bitcoins, #ka ching ka ching

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Dogbert: I started an online marketplace for dumb criminals. As soon as I get enought users, I'll steal all of their bitcoins. Bushahahaha! Dilbert: Is this morally defensible? Dogbert: Here's my argument: Ka-ching! Ka-ching!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #miserliness, #wages, #good work, #saves billons, #no raise, #personal item, #on desk, #insoubordination, #abuse of power, #boss, #money

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Boss: Alice, your good work has saved the company over a billion dollars. But I can't give you a raise because you once had a personal item on your desk. Alice: How are those things equal?!! Boss: And here comes the insubordination.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #work ethic, #brain wash, #company profits, #more imprtant, #employers engagement, #12 hour days, #work for money

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Catbert: I'm going to brainwash you to believe company profits are more important than your health. It's called "employee engagement," and it will make you work 12-hour days while thinking you enjoy every minute of it. Dilbert: Can I just work for money? Catbert: Why are you being a jerk about this?