1992 Comic Strips - Page 16
Search Filters
Year
- 2023
- 2022
- 2021
- 2020
- 2019
- 2018
- 2017
- 2016
- 2015
- 2014
- 2013
- 2012
- 2011
- 2010
- 2009
- 2008
- 2007
- 2006
- 2005
- 2004
- 2003
- 2002
- 2001
- 2000
- 1999
- 1998
- 1997
- 1996
- 1995
- 1994
- 1993
- 1992
- 1991
- 1990
- 1989
Character
Monday August 03,
1992
Tags god, language, report, Dilbert, tim, monkey, incan, awful, write, lucky, translate
Transcript
Dilbert says to Tim, "Gee, Tim, you look awful." Tim replies, "I've been working for five days without any sleep to finish this report." Tim's clothes are disheveled and he has circles under his eyes. Tim continues, "At first I had a mental block. But on the fourth day I was visited by an Incan monkey god who told me what to write." Dilbert replies, "Wow, lucky break." Tim says, "Now I just have to find somebody who can translate his simple but beautiful language."
Sunday August 02,
1992
Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, walk, nature, wonderful, planet, children, strangers, borrow, collateral, smoking, shell, overlooked, Environment, situation, want, selfish
Transcript
Dogbert and Dilbert walk through the park. Dilbert says, "Nature is so wonderful . . ." Dilbert continues, "They say we don't leave the planet to future generations, we borrow it from our children." Dogbert says, "It's even better than that." Dogbert continues, "WE don't have children, so we're borrowing the planet from complete strangers!" Dogbert continues, "And there's no collateral. We can use up the planet, have great lives and leave an empty smoking shell to the strangers!" Dogbert continues, "I tell you, people have completely overlooked the positive side of this environment situation." Dilbert says, "But someday I WANT to have children." Dogbert replies, "Let's hope they're not as selfish as you."
Saturday August 01,
1992
Tags Dogbert, Dilbert, happy, think, hypnotized, worrying, hypnosis
Transcript
Dilbert and Dogbert walk outdoors. Dilbert says, "I thought I was happy . . ." Dilbert continues, "Then I thought what if I only THINK I'm happy but I'm not. Maybe I've been hypnotized and don't even know it." Dilbert continues, "Worrying about it made me unhappy, which means I must NOT be under hypnosis, so I'm happy." Dogbert replies, "Maybe I only THINK you're talking but really I'm happy."
Friday July 31,
1992
Tags movie, office, tv, Wally, Dilbert, sofa, alice, mary, soap
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk. A woman outside the cubicle says, "Alice, Mary, let's go to the ladies room!" The woman holds up a videotape and says, "I rented 'Gone With the Wind.' We can watch it on the big screen tv." Another woman says, "I want the grey sofa!" Wally enters Dilbert's cubicle and says, "Hey, look! The men's room has SOAP!!"
Thursday July 30,
1992
Tags Dogbert, ratbert, copy, newsletter, clueless, people, situation, conversational, geometry
Transcript
Dogbert says to Ratbert, "Ratbert, I brought you a copy of the 'Dogbert Clueletter,' the newsletter for clueless people." Ratbert replies, "No thanks. I used to be clueless but I turned that situation around 360 degrees." Ratbert reads the newsletter, "Dogbert's clues to conversational geometry."
Wednesday July 29,
1992
Tags conversation, Dogbert, Dilbert, newsletter, clueless, people, clever, typing
Transcript
Dogbert sits at a desk. Dilbert says, "Well, there you are, working on your little newsletter for clueless people . . ." Dilbert continues, "You're probably thinking up some clever little fact that the so-called people would never realize on their own." Dilbert reads the monitor and says, "Let me see . . . 'If you are the only one talking then it is a clue that no conversation is occurring and it is time to leave."
Tuesday July 28,
1992
Tags exercise, happiness, Dogbert, bob, newsletter, clueless, professional, wrestling, home, device, looks, brains, healthy, read
Transcript
Dogbert hands Bob the Dinosaur a publication and says, "Bob, here's a copy of my new newsletter for clueless people." Bob reads, "Dogbert's Clues for the Clueless: 1. Professional wrestling is all faked. 2. Nobody ever lost weight on a home exercise device." Bob looks upset as he continues to read, "3. Looks are more important to happiness than brains. 4. If people don't comment on you new hairdo, they hate it." Dogbert says, "It's not healthy to read them all at once, Bob."
Monday July 27,
1992
Tags questions, Dilbert, Dogbert, newsletter, clueless, people, technical, marvel, desktop, publishing, immense, wisdom
Transcript
Dogbert sits at a desk typing. Dilbert looks over Dogbert's shoulder and asks, "What's this?" Dogbert replies, "I'm starting my own newsletter for clueless people." Dogbert continues, "Thanks to the technical marvel of desktop publishing, clueless people will now have the benefit of my immense wisdom." Dilbert asks, "How do you know who the clueless people are?" Dogbert replies, "They ask a lot of questions."
Sunday July 26,
1992
Tags Dogbert, hands of death, protest, movie, boycott, redhead, hot tempered, ignorant, stereotype, boycot, pound, pulp, sean, dennis
Transcript
Two men form a picket line in front of a movie theater showing a movie titled, "Hands of Death." Dogbert walks around the corner. Dogbert asks one of the men holding a sign, "Why are you protesting against this movie?" The man replies, "It portrays red heads as hot tempered and ignorant." Dogbert asks, "How many red heads are in the movie?" The man replies, "One. But the point is, red heads don't fit their stereotype of being hot tempered and ignorant." Dogbert says, "Actually, ignorance was never a stereotype of red heads until you brought it up here." The man yells at the other protester, "Sean, you idiot! I told you!" Sean replies, "Shut up, Dennis! I'll pound you to a pulp!!" As they fight each other, Dogbert adds, "And 'boycott' is spelled with a double 'T.'"
Saturday July 25,
1992
Tags Dogbert, model, evaluation, advantage, hideous, service
Transcript
Dogbert says to a woman walking on the sidewalk, "Excuse me, would you like to take advantage of our 'Model Evaluation Service?' Only ten dollars." The woman says, "Me? Gosh, I've never thought of myself that way. Yes, I would love to be evaluated." Dogbert says, "You're hideous . . . That's ten dollars." The woman looks angry.


