Bad Things Comic Strips - Page 16

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Bad Things

View 151 - 160 results for bad things comic strips. Discover the best "Bad Things" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #deadlines, #finish on time, #forty hours, #good news, #bad news, #boss, #Dilbert

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at his computer as The Boss says, "Good news: The deadline got pushed back a week." Dilbert says to The Boss, "Good news?! I've been working for forty hours straight to finish on time!" The Boss thinks, "I just realized I don't know the difference between good news and bad news."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #phone call, #outgoing message, #paris, #press one, #movie, #press two, #bad feeling

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert, pressing buttons on his portable telephone to the sound of, "beep boop beep," thinks to himself, "I hope she's home." Listening to his phone, Dilbert hears, "If you'd like to take me to Paris, press one. If you are inviting me to a lousy movie, press two." Dilbert presses a button on his phone to the sound of, "beep," and thinks to himself, "I've got a bad feeling about this."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #good news, #bad news, #power utility, #company, #new vp opeartaions, #offcie, #wheel attached, #generator, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert says to Ratbert, "Ratbert, I have good news and bad news." Dogbert says to a happy Ratbert, "The good news is I'm starting up a power utility company and you're my new VP of Operations!" Dogbert says to a chagrined Ratbert, "The bad news is that your office is inside a wheel attached to a generator."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #downsized, #job functions, #unimportant things, #outsourced

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss approaches Dilbert and says, "I downsized Ted and outsourced his important job functions." The boss continues, "I'd like you to do all of his unimportant job functions." Dilbert asks, "Why do we do unimportant things?" The boss says, "Because we can!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #new things to say, #fill airtime, #let other people talk

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Wally stand having coffee. Wally says, "I'm running out of new things to say." Wally continues, "I'll have to start repeating myself just to fill the airtime." Dilbert replies, "You could let other people talk." Wally continues, "So, anyway, I'm running out of new things to say."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bad data, #data, #grossly inaccurate, #managing is hard

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Wally and Dilbert, "All of our data is grossly inaccurate... but I need data in order to manage." The Boss continues, "If I concentrate hard enough I can forget that the data is bad. Then I can use it." Wally and Dilbert watch as The Boss shakes with clenched teeth. Wally says, "I have to give him credit.; managing is harder than it looks."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #job market, #bad job market, #how hard, #unemployed, #leader

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert is sitting at his computer. The Boss approaches from behind and asks, "How's the ol' job market lately? It's pretty bad, isn't it?" The Boss continues, "So no matter how hard I make you work it's still better than being unemployed." Dilbert turns in surprise. The Boss says, "Who's your leader? Go on, say it." Dilbert puts his head in his hands and replies quietly, "You are."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #be a threat, #Dogbert, #recruitment agency, #clueless people, #bad hair, #cadaver program

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert stands on The Boss' desk. Dogbert says, "You need to hire people who won't be a threat to you." Dogbert hands The Boss a pamphlet and says, "The Dogbert Recruiting Agency specializes in the placement of clueless people with bad hair." The Boss replies, "I don't know... They still look threatening." Dogbert says, "Perhaps I can interest you in our cadaver program."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #good meeting, #reveal incompetence, #attendees, #bad meeting

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert comes home. He says to Dogbert, "I just had a good meeting." Dogbert responds, "Maybe it just didn't last long enough to reveal the incompetence of the attendees." Dilbert replies, "That's what I call a good meeting." Dogbert responds, "I'm having a bad meeting."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bad job, #package, #quit without notice, #severance package

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina asks The Boss, "What's our current severance package?" The Boss answers, "I transfer you to a bad job and you quit without giving notice." Tina says, "I hate your package." The Boss replies, "I hear that a lot."