Boss Delegating Job Comic Strips - Page 16

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View 151 - 160 results for boss delegating job comic strips. Discover the best "Boss Delegating Job" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags golf tournament, contrast, strikes you, contrast in jobs, secretary and boss

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The Boss: I'm off to the executive golf tournament. "It just struck me how much contrast there is between your job and mine. Gotta go." Carol: "Let me know if anything else strikes you."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags fired, job eliminated, outsourced, comapny, need job, hired, comes back, old job

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The Boss: "Ted, I'm going to eliminate your function and outsource it to the Dogbert Outsourcing Company." Ted: "I need a job." Dogbert: "You're hired." Ted: "I'M BA-A-ACK!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags apply for opening, manager, bonding, compete for same job

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Dilbert: Do you mind if I apply for the opening in R&D? The Boss: Hey, I just applied for the manager job there? Dilbert: Um...maybe I'll wait. The Boss: To make sure I'll be your boss?" Dilbert: Ooo-kay... The Boss: This must be what bonding feels like."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags boss gives pen, 20 years at job, could be old

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The Boss: Congratulations on 20 years of service. Here's a pen with the company's logo. "I have one just like it. At least I think this one is mine. I might have gotten them mixed up." "Which one looks like it spent the least time in my ear?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags absurd aasignments, cartoonist, comic embarrasing, cubicle, evaluate technology, fire him, no economical applaication, new job

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Catbert: We have a report of a cartoonist in Cubicle 45950. His comics might embarrass the company. "We can't fire him because it would look bad. You must give him absurd assignments until he quits." The Boss: "Your new job is to evaluate technology that obviously has no economical application." "Woo hoo!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags recessions, regular interns, interns intern, no pay, semi relevant job experience, slap you, no reason, stupid economy

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Boss: We don't have any openings for regular interns, but I can offer you a job as an intern to our intern. We won't pay you, of course, but you might acquire an imperceptible amount of semi-relevant job experience. And sometimes we'll slap you for no reason. Applicant: Stupid economy! I'll take it.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags sales personnel, cold calling, video chat, sales job, computer, selling on line, skype, technology

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Boss: You're supposed to be cold calling sales prospects. Wally: I am. I'm using a video chat site to randomly meet potential customers. This guy is excited to see me, and that's half of the sales job right here.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags honesty, managers & supervisors, bad job, new assignment, poor job, matching skills, business

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Boss: Can you explain why you're doing such a bad job on your new assignment? Dilbert: Yes I can: some idiot did a poor job matching my skills to my assignment. Boss: Let's try it again, but this time say something bad about yourself. Dilbert: I'm too honest?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dieting & weight control, interviews, tattoos & body marking, job interview, face tattoo, overeating, bad idea, people can see, dont interview well

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Boss: Did you ever think that getting that face tattoo might be a bad career move? Interviewee: No. Was there ever a time you thought overeating was a bad idea? Because people can see that. Boss: You don't interview well. Job interview

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags meetings, work ethic, execution, innovation, full time job, excellence, inspired, died on inside, coffee and resentment, chemical formula for hatred, drilled employees

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Boss: Execution is a game of inches! You miss 100% of the shots you don't take! Innovation is everyone's full-time job! Be the dog, not the tail! Excellence is the only market that isn't crowded! Why don't any of you look inspired by my leadership? Wally: I died on the inside years ago. Now I'm just a fleshy container full of coffee and resentment. This guy was born without a soul. The she-devil at the end is the chemical formula for hatred. Catbert: Did you get through to them? Boss: I drilled until I hit bile.