Deception Comic Strips - Page 16
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157 Results for Deception
View 151 - 157 results for deception comic strips. Discover the best "Deception" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday February 06,
2018
Wally Pivots
Tags work ethic, laziness, deception, projects
Transcript
Wally: My project was failing, so I pivoted to a different idea with the same name. Later, I'll change the project name to cover my tracks. Asok: What about your sunk costs? Wally: Gone like footprints in the sands of time.
Saturday March 10,
2018
Mentor Can't Tell A Hoax From Reality
Tags Advice, competition, bad advice, deception, wedgie
Transcript
Man: Alice has been mentoring me for a month, and I can't tell how much of her advice is real and how much is a hoax. For example, she advised me to give our boss a wedgie because she said he likes assertive people. Is that real? Dilbert: I'm gonna say yes.
Friday March 09,
2018
Boss Loves Criticism
Tags mentor, mentee, protege, Advice, competition, deception
Transcript
Alice The Mentor. Alice: One thing I can tell you about our boss is that he loves constructive criticism. Man: I feel as if your advice is intended to make me fail because you see me as a threat to take your job. Alice: And he loves it when you grab him by the hair and yell, "handles!"
Sunday June 03,
2018
Tags work ethic, productivity, progress, project, deception
Transcript
Asok: I finished my project! Dilbert: Shhhh! Don't let anyone hear you say that. Only one of two things can come of it. Either you'll get more work or you'll get fired for not having enough work. Asok: Then how does anyone ever finish a project around here? Wally: We don't. We manipulate our boss into adding features so our projects are never complete. Asok: Is that hard to do? Dilbert: Not as hard as you might hope. Asok: How do you like the prototype so far? Boss: It needs a red button and some cooling fins.
Saturday June 09,
2018
Wally's Stealth Drone
Tags deception, deceit, drone, technology, invention, fake
Transcript
Wally: In my right hand is a standard drone. In my left hand is a drone using the cloaking technology I invented. Voices: Ooh! Wow! Wally: I'll demonstrate it flying as soon as I finish the noise cancellation. CEO: Employee of the year!
Sunday July 15,
2018
Tags deception, deceit, contract, cost, money
Transcript
Man: Here's my invoice for the extras. Dilbert: The invoice we already paid covered everything in the contract. Man: That only covered the costs I quoted with intentional clarity. There are other costs that I might have mentioned in the long and rambling explanation that was intentionally ambiguous. Dilbert: "Might have??" I'm sure you did not. Man: Sounds like your word against mine. Dilbert: And even if you did mention it, you just said it was intentionally ambiguous!!! Man: I don't think you want to tell your boss you're a bad listener. Boss: I thought we already paid this vendor. Dilbert: Did you forget all the extras I told you about?
Friday May 14,
2021
Bigot In Your Mind
Tags business, managers & supervisors, boss, marriage, avoid, bigot, mind, self-deception, real world, Win, hire
Transcript
boss: i hear you're marrying an elbonian man to avoid being called a bigot. but it doesn't work that way. you can still be a bigot in your mind, no matter what you do in the real world. dilbert: so... there's no way to win? boss: did i forget to tell you that when i hired you?


